First – NEVER EVER ATTEMPT IMPROMPTU EAR SURGERY ON YOUR CHILDREN, OR ANYONE ELSE’S. EARS ARE VERY DELICATE AND FRAGILE AND UNLESS YOU ARE ONE OF THOSE DOCTORS, YOU ARE STUPID TO TRY IT.
Second – That being said, here’s some tips:
1. Get good lighting – a maglight with fresh batteries works great.
2. Get a good view of the obstruction – before you begin any work, make sure you see the problem and identify it correctly. Be at least 90% sure you actually see the problem. It helps to have a reference ear to look at. Books are nice, but rarely resemble the real thing. If you can look in a different child’s ear to see what its SUPPOSED to look like, that’s good.
3. A Leatherman tool is too big.
4. The hook on a nail file (from toenail clippers) doesn’t work – it doesn’t hook enough.
5. Two small flat-head screw drivers are the right size, but the handles are too big and I only have two hands.
6. Good old fashioned tweezers work well and are easy to handle.
7. Having other children hold the patient’s ear doesn’t work well because they get distracted easy.
8. Make sure you take away the Leatherman from the other children – they might try to pinch your patient causing them to jump.
9. If you can’t get a good grip on the obstruction, first pour water in the ear to soften the obstruction and help it expand outwards – making it easier to grab.
10. You have to be good at holding the ear at the right angle and the maglight in the right place at the same time (with the same hand) - practice makes perfect.
11. Make sure you get everything out.
Third - NEVER EVER ATTEMPT IMPROMPTU EAR SURGERY ON YOUR CHILDREN, OR ANYONE ELSE’S. EARS ARE VERY DELICATE AND FRAGILE AND UNLESS YOU ARE ONE OF THOSE DOCTORS, YOU ARE STUPID TO TRY IT.
Monday, November 26, 2007
Sunday, November 11, 2007
Mini- Vacation
Mini-Vacation
We just got back from a mini-vacation! It was without a doubt one of the best mini-vacations we've had. It all started with a thought to go down to Savannah this weekend and just have fun. Then, we found out that there was a World Wide Flash Mob going on at the park and so the mini-vacation began to revolve around that!
Our plan for the trip to Savannah really only had two missions: 1. Go to the WWFM and 2. Have fun. We succeeded.
After school and dinner we drove down Friday night to Savannah, looked for a place to stay, saw one that was too expensive and then one that wasn't expensive enough and eventually ventured back out of the city a few miles and grabbed a nice middle-of-the-road hotel. The kids love hotels - I have no idea why. We went to bed.
While at the hotel, we discovered that there were three geocaches in the immediate vicinity that would be a great start for our geo-cation (geocaching + vacation) the next day. We planned them in.
We woke up at 0800 and had some breakfast at the hotel and then checked out at 0930. We picked up three geocaches in Pooler and headed into Savannah. First we crossed over the big bridge and headed out for an off-road cache that was by far the most off-road terrain we've been in since we left Colorado. It had dirt, trees, mud, sand, hills and spiders. And it was the first time the Jeep had expereinced soft deep sand - which it handled with no problem, and at the end, was even playing in it!
We damned near drove up to the cache, dogged some spiders and headed back out. The spiders were big and sneaky, having put up webs between trees and just waiting for some hapless person to wander into them. I doubt they could have eaten one of us, but just in case, we left the kids in the Jeep.
On the way out, we played with the Jeep in the mud and the sand and then took off. We must have caught some rocks or something in the brake because it squealed on and off the rest of the day.
After getting the Jeep all dirty we drove into Savannah and parked by the big, famous cemetary. There is a cache nearby, so we grabbed it and then began our walk to the WWFM. The mob event went off without a hitch and we even won a container to place our own cache! When the event was over, we walked around Savannah and gathered up some more caches and historical sites.
My girls are all Girl Scouts, so we went and saw the first Girl Scout Headquarters and the birthplace of Juliette Gordon Low (the Girl Scout founder). Then we hopped back in the Jeep and headed out to Tybee Island.
On the island, we found even more caches and played on the beach and in the Atlantic Ocean (for the record, its our second ocean visit of the year - the first was the Pacific off the California coast).
It was dark when we found our last cache (and the skull of some dead animal nearby) near a swamp. It would have been very hard to find any more in the dark, so we headed back to Savannah and picked up two Virtual Caches (caches without a physical container - just a place). When all was said and done, we had finished 16 more caches! Whoo hoo! A new one day record for us!
We drove home safe and sound and everyone is now fast asleep - for the most part. A great mini-vacation!
We just got back from a mini-vacation! It was without a doubt one of the best mini-vacations we've had. It all started with a thought to go down to Savannah this weekend and just have fun. Then, we found out that there was a World Wide Flash Mob going on at the park and so the mini-vacation began to revolve around that!
Our plan for the trip to Savannah really only had two missions: 1. Go to the WWFM and 2. Have fun. We succeeded.
After school and dinner we drove down Friday night to Savannah, looked for a place to stay, saw one that was too expensive and then one that wasn't expensive enough and eventually ventured back out of the city a few miles and grabbed a nice middle-of-the-road hotel. The kids love hotels - I have no idea why. We went to bed.
While at the hotel, we discovered that there were three geocaches in the immediate vicinity that would be a great start for our geo-cation (geocaching + vacation) the next day. We planned them in.
We woke up at 0800 and had some breakfast at the hotel and then checked out at 0930. We picked up three geocaches in Pooler and headed into Savannah. First we crossed over the big bridge and headed out for an off-road cache that was by far the most off-road terrain we've been in since we left Colorado. It had dirt, trees, mud, sand, hills and spiders. And it was the first time the Jeep had expereinced soft deep sand - which it handled with no problem, and at the end, was even playing in it!
We damned near drove up to the cache, dogged some spiders and headed back out. The spiders were big and sneaky, having put up webs between trees and just waiting for some hapless person to wander into them. I doubt they could have eaten one of us, but just in case, we left the kids in the Jeep.
On the way out, we played with the Jeep in the mud and the sand and then took off. We must have caught some rocks or something in the brake because it squealed on and off the rest of the day.
After getting the Jeep all dirty we drove into Savannah and parked by the big, famous cemetary. There is a cache nearby, so we grabbed it and then began our walk to the WWFM. The mob event went off without a hitch and we even won a container to place our own cache! When the event was over, we walked around Savannah and gathered up some more caches and historical sites.
My girls are all Girl Scouts, so we went and saw the first Girl Scout Headquarters and the birthplace of Juliette Gordon Low (the Girl Scout founder). Then we hopped back in the Jeep and headed out to Tybee Island.
On the island, we found even more caches and played on the beach and in the Atlantic Ocean (for the record, its our second ocean visit of the year - the first was the Pacific off the California coast).
It was dark when we found our last cache (and the skull of some dead animal nearby) near a swamp. It would have been very hard to find any more in the dark, so we headed back to Savannah and picked up two Virtual Caches (caches without a physical container - just a place). When all was said and done, we had finished 16 more caches! Whoo hoo! A new one day record for us!
We drove home safe and sound and everyone is now fast asleep - for the most part. A great mini-vacation!
Saturday, November 3, 2007
Waiting to grow up
When I was a young kid, before I was eight, my father was the biggest, bestest person in the world. He was my hero, everything I looked up to and wanted to be - he was a man. Then, tragically, he died in a car accident. It was, of course, very hard on me. But, moving on from the saddness, I've noticed some things.
Even though I got older, grew up and learned more about life and all that, my dad never did get any older, he was frozen in time - by my perception - and for me, he was that "ideal" person and he will be, forever. Is that good or bad, I think it can be both. A lot of people grow up and realize that their parents aren't the superheros who can do anything and who know everything - my dad still is. I never had a falling out or anything like that - every memory I have is a positive one (even the time I got spanked, because I knew I had done wrong). So, even as I grow up and get older and, theoretically, wiser, my dad is always better, he is near perfect - someone I strive to be. I know I can never achieve an ideal that exists only in a 7 year old's perception, but I can try.
Would my dad be proud of all I've done up til now? No, probably not, just like I'm not. But would he understand? Absolutely. He's been there and done that. Would he have told me not to do thing because he knew they would be bad for me? Probably. And I probably still would have done them. Its hard to learn from other's mistakes because we always think it'll be different for us. Usually its not. I think that is part of the frustration that parents have as their kids grow up, knowing that the kid will eventually regret what they are doing, but being unable to convince them of the fact and probably even being shunned because of it. Most people usually need to learn things for themselves, the hard way.
But, back to my point. Recently, I've run into a paradox with my dad. He will always be older and wiser; however, back in September of this year, I became older than him. So now, I have lived longer, experienced more (theoretically), but he is still older and wiser (in my mind). It's a strange feeling to be older than your parent.
And now, looking back, I KNOW that my dad was a man when he was my age - it was without question and I'd laugh if anyone said that he might not feel the same way. But, here I am, older than he and I wonder sometimes whether or not I've grown up. All the evidence would point to my indeed having become a man at some point in the past 30 years: I have 5 kids, a decent job, a college education, I've been to combat, been shot at, and someone has tried to blow me up a couple of times, and all my bosses say I do a great job. So, I think the evidence would point to my having become a man at some point in there. I just don't feel it. I feel like a kid still - waiting to grow up. And, like a kid, I blame my dad. =)
Even though I got older, grew up and learned more about life and all that, my dad never did get any older, he was frozen in time - by my perception - and for me, he was that "ideal" person and he will be, forever. Is that good or bad, I think it can be both. A lot of people grow up and realize that their parents aren't the superheros who can do anything and who know everything - my dad still is. I never had a falling out or anything like that - every memory I have is a positive one (even the time I got spanked, because I knew I had done wrong). So, even as I grow up and get older and, theoretically, wiser, my dad is always better, he is near perfect - someone I strive to be. I know I can never achieve an ideal that exists only in a 7 year old's perception, but I can try.
Would my dad be proud of all I've done up til now? No, probably not, just like I'm not. But would he understand? Absolutely. He's been there and done that. Would he have told me not to do thing because he knew they would be bad for me? Probably. And I probably still would have done them. Its hard to learn from other's mistakes because we always think it'll be different for us. Usually its not. I think that is part of the frustration that parents have as their kids grow up, knowing that the kid will eventually regret what they are doing, but being unable to convince them of the fact and probably even being shunned because of it. Most people usually need to learn things for themselves, the hard way.
But, back to my point. Recently, I've run into a paradox with my dad. He will always be older and wiser; however, back in September of this year, I became older than him. So now, I have lived longer, experienced more (theoretically), but he is still older and wiser (in my mind). It's a strange feeling to be older than your parent.
And now, looking back, I KNOW that my dad was a man when he was my age - it was without question and I'd laugh if anyone said that he might not feel the same way. But, here I am, older than he and I wonder sometimes whether or not I've grown up. All the evidence would point to my indeed having become a man at some point in the past 30 years: I have 5 kids, a decent job, a college education, I've been to combat, been shot at, and someone has tried to blow me up a couple of times, and all my bosses say I do a great job. So, I think the evidence would point to my having become a man at some point in there. I just don't feel it. I feel like a kid still - waiting to grow up. And, like a kid, I blame my dad. =)
Growing older
Its hard for me to admit that I may, indeed, be growing older. Its crazy, I know, but apparently time has not stopped for me. I can't really be growing older, because I'm still waiting to feel like an adult. When exactly does that happen I wonder?
Anyway, the first inkling of growing older for me was not too long ago - I was running, as usual, when I developed a severe pain in my left calf. It hurt like hell, but I sucked it up and finished what I had planned to run, thinking the pain would go away. It didn't and I limped the last 1/4 mile. After that, it took about two weeks of resting and babying it for it to get better and only recently (within the last week) did it stop hurting all-together. That was the first sign of old. The second came just this last Friday (yesterday) when I was playing football. I was doing great, feeling good, jumping around, running, shucking, jiving and all that good stuff. But, near the end of the game, while I was returning a punt, I zigged this way and zagged that way, but when I zagged, I also tried to accellerate and pushed off hard on my left leg. I felt like something snapped in my upper left hamstring, and luckily someone was there to tag me so I didn't look like I hurt something - but I couldn't run at all. There were only a couple of seconds left on the clock, so I took the snap off the shotgun and pretended not to hurt (so the guy wouldn't rush in right away). I threw the ball deep into the in-zone and thankfully the receiver caught the ball. So, we won the game - thats the important part. The not so important, but much longer lasting, part is the fact that I limped off the field. I had never felt pain like it before, it was very unsettling, but I was sure it would go away - it always does.
Now, I sit here typing and my leg still hurts! I can't flex it much one way or the other before it hurts. I hope it too will go away (the pain, not the leg) once I rest it some more and take it easy. But, two relatively serious muscle injuries in a two week period isn't good. And I think its happening because I'm getting old. My poor body is breaking down and isn't recovering as fast as it once did.
I just found out another thing today that makes me feel older - someone I knew in high school (a teacher), just passed away. She was a great person who I could actually credit with first encouraging the questioning of what some people consider to be facts, when they are really beliefs. I'm sure she didn't know it, but our discussion way back then about an apparent flaw in the whole science/religion thing has always stuck with me and given me the keyhole to look through religion and to see what is behind the curtain. I'm pretty sure she'd be dissapointed in how that turned out, because it wasn't what she believed. But, I hope she could take some credit for allowing me to question the belief and to hold it up to some scrutiny without simply putting it down, thereby encouring myself and others to seek the truth and to not settle for what is fed to us.
I hope Ms. Hazelbaker has found what she was looking for and may she rest in peace.
Anyway, the first inkling of growing older for me was not too long ago - I was running, as usual, when I developed a severe pain in my left calf. It hurt like hell, but I sucked it up and finished what I had planned to run, thinking the pain would go away. It didn't and I limped the last 1/4 mile. After that, it took about two weeks of resting and babying it for it to get better and only recently (within the last week) did it stop hurting all-together. That was the first sign of old. The second came just this last Friday (yesterday) when I was playing football. I was doing great, feeling good, jumping around, running, shucking, jiving and all that good stuff. But, near the end of the game, while I was returning a punt, I zigged this way and zagged that way, but when I zagged, I also tried to accellerate and pushed off hard on my left leg. I felt like something snapped in my upper left hamstring, and luckily someone was there to tag me so I didn't look like I hurt something - but I couldn't run at all. There were only a couple of seconds left on the clock, so I took the snap off the shotgun and pretended not to hurt (so the guy wouldn't rush in right away). I threw the ball deep into the in-zone and thankfully the receiver caught the ball. So, we won the game - thats the important part. The not so important, but much longer lasting, part is the fact that I limped off the field. I had never felt pain like it before, it was very unsettling, but I was sure it would go away - it always does.
Now, I sit here typing and my leg still hurts! I can't flex it much one way or the other before it hurts. I hope it too will go away (the pain, not the leg) once I rest it some more and take it easy. But, two relatively serious muscle injuries in a two week period isn't good. And I think its happening because I'm getting old. My poor body is breaking down and isn't recovering as fast as it once did.
I just found out another thing today that makes me feel older - someone I knew in high school (a teacher), just passed away. She was a great person who I could actually credit with first encouraging the questioning of what some people consider to be facts, when they are really beliefs. I'm sure she didn't know it, but our discussion way back then about an apparent flaw in the whole science/religion thing has always stuck with me and given me the keyhole to look through religion and to see what is behind the curtain. I'm pretty sure she'd be dissapointed in how that turned out, because it wasn't what she believed. But, I hope she could take some credit for allowing me to question the belief and to hold it up to some scrutiny without simply putting it down, thereby encouring myself and others to seek the truth and to not settle for what is fed to us.
I hope Ms. Hazelbaker has found what she was looking for and may she rest in peace.
Took the GRE
On Thursday I went in to schedule my appointment to take the GRE (Graduate Record Examination). On Friday morning I was in the quiet little enclosed room, looking at a computer monitor as it asked me questions about trains leaving Detroit and how the views of women's research has changed in the past 100 years.
Before I get deeper into the thing, let me tell you how I came to need to take the test. When I was in Iraq, about a 1 3/4 years ago, I filled out a little form that said I wanted to be part of the Army Advanced Civil Schooling program. If I was accepted to the program, the Army would allow me to go to a University and get a Master's degree in virtually whatever I wanted. How could I not jump on the chance? Well, soon after I got back home, I discovered that I had been accepted into the ACS program and was eligible to go to ACS in FY2009 (October 2008 or later). That was great news, and I put it on the back burner because it was far away. I knew I had to take the GRE, but I had a long time to study, so why worry about it.
After that we moved to Georgia for the Career Course. Once I saw what crappy assignments were coming out of here, I talked to my Branch Manager and got my ACS slot moved up to the FY2008 - so I can go straight to school from SCCC. I applied to some schools and then I needed to take the GRE. My "preparation" for the GRE was to get a GRE book from the library and make sure it held the coffee table down for a couple of weeks. Then I took a practice test and half-assed it while I watched some TV. I did alright, so I wasn't too worried about it.
The only thing that concerned me was that this test pretty much decided the next four years of where we would go. If I did good, we could go where we wanted, if I didn't, there was the chance I wouldnt get into grad school and would be stuck with some crappy assignment the Army wanted me for - probably Iraq or Korea.
But, in order to prepare the day before, I made sure I studied some vocab words and got a good amount of sleep. The day of the test, I went and did PT - played some football - and came home and got ready for the test. I think that was what helped me stay relaxed, PT and rest. And relaxation is the key to doing the best you can.
The first part of the test was two essays or writings about some random topic they give you. After that I had two math sections and one vocab (verbal) section.
The best part was after I finished the test. Once I finished I had the choice of seeing my results, or canceling the test. The computer makes sure to tell you that if you see your results - YOU CAN'T CANCEL after that. It's almost like they want you to think you did bad. Regardless of how I did, I had to have the results, so I clicked the submit button.
My Verbal GRE score was 670 and my Quantitative (Math) was 710. After looking around to see what "good" was, I guess I can say I did "good." My verbal seems to be higher than most and my "quantitative" is at least average. I shouldn't have any problem getting into a school.
So, our next stop should be college!
Before I get deeper into the thing, let me tell you how I came to need to take the test. When I was in Iraq, about a 1 3/4 years ago, I filled out a little form that said I wanted to be part of the Army Advanced Civil Schooling program. If I was accepted to the program, the Army would allow me to go to a University and get a Master's degree in virtually whatever I wanted. How could I not jump on the chance? Well, soon after I got back home, I discovered that I had been accepted into the ACS program and was eligible to go to ACS in FY2009 (October 2008 or later). That was great news, and I put it on the back burner because it was far away. I knew I had to take the GRE, but I had a long time to study, so why worry about it.
After that we moved to Georgia for the Career Course. Once I saw what crappy assignments were coming out of here, I talked to my Branch Manager and got my ACS slot moved up to the FY2008 - so I can go straight to school from SCCC. I applied to some schools and then I needed to take the GRE. My "preparation" for the GRE was to get a GRE book from the library and make sure it held the coffee table down for a couple of weeks. Then I took a practice test and half-assed it while I watched some TV. I did alright, so I wasn't too worried about it.
The only thing that concerned me was that this test pretty much decided the next four years of where we would go. If I did good, we could go where we wanted, if I didn't, there was the chance I wouldnt get into grad school and would be stuck with some crappy assignment the Army wanted me for - probably Iraq or Korea.
But, in order to prepare the day before, I made sure I studied some vocab words and got a good amount of sleep. The day of the test, I went and did PT - played some football - and came home and got ready for the test. I think that was what helped me stay relaxed, PT and rest. And relaxation is the key to doing the best you can.
The first part of the test was two essays or writings about some random topic they give you. After that I had two math sections and one vocab (verbal) section.
The best part was after I finished the test. Once I finished I had the choice of seeing my results, or canceling the test. The computer makes sure to tell you that if you see your results - YOU CAN'T CANCEL after that. It's almost like they want you to think you did bad. Regardless of how I did, I had to have the results, so I clicked the submit button.
My Verbal GRE score was 670 and my Quantitative (Math) was 710. After looking around to see what "good" was, I guess I can say I did "good." My verbal seems to be higher than most and my "quantitative" is at least average. I shouldn't have any problem getting into a school.
So, our next stop should be college!
Happy New Year!
New Year, at least for the planet. The world is now resting in peace. A new beginning awaits around the corner. Its a New Year.
In light of it being a new year and a time of fresh beginnings, I have decided to start fresh as well. I have relieved the children of the punishments they suffered so hard under this past year and let them start fresh. I'm sure they will be back in the hole within a few weeks - its a good thing the new year comes around once a year.
Someone once asked why November first is the New Year...
Short story - Nov 1 is the New Year because Oct 31st is the last day of the year!
Longer story, but not too long - Back in the olden days before religions began to take over the world and change calendars and to set things up the way they are - with arbitrary dates signifying not much of anything - the year was thought to begin at about this time of year - our early November - because that is the time when the earth is no longer living (not necessarily dead - just not really living, kinda like sleeping); the trees are losing their leaves, the ground doesn't produce crops - the planet slumbers. Some took the time between Nov 1 and Yule as a "time out of time" where the year ended at Samhain (Oct 31) and the year didn't begin until Yule. The time in between those times was thought to be magical and "a time out of time." But, I think that that "time out of time" is really more of a hibernation, the time when the world rests and prepares for the next year, where it will produce and live and gather itself together until it goes back to sleep.
In light of it being a new year and a time of fresh beginnings, I have decided to start fresh as well. I have relieved the children of the punishments they suffered so hard under this past year and let them start fresh. I'm sure they will be back in the hole within a few weeks - its a good thing the new year comes around once a year.
Someone once asked why November first is the New Year...
Short story - Nov 1 is the New Year because Oct 31st is the last day of the year!
Longer story, but not too long - Back in the olden days before religions began to take over the world and change calendars and to set things up the way they are - with arbitrary dates signifying not much of anything - the year was thought to begin at about this time of year - our early November - because that is the time when the earth is no longer living (not necessarily dead - just not really living, kinda like sleeping); the trees are losing their leaves, the ground doesn't produce crops - the planet slumbers. Some took the time between Nov 1 and Yule as a "time out of time" where the year ended at Samhain (Oct 31) and the year didn't begin until Yule. The time in between those times was thought to be magical and "a time out of time." But, I think that that "time out of time" is really more of a hibernation, the time when the world rests and prepares for the next year, where it will produce and live and gather itself together until it goes back to sleep.
Saturday, October 27, 2007
Military Priorities
The military is claiming that it needs to borrow Russian cargo planes (C-5s and C-17s) to move MRAPs to Iraq because it doesn't have enough of its own. And on the same page, the military is using a C-17 to move an elephant from Alaska to California. At least they have their priorities straight! Maybe elephants will become the new counter-insurgent tool!
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Updates...
I always feel guilty when I don't write something for awhile, so here's a quick update on whats up:
1. We're still down here in god-awful Georgia. I'm going through the Captain's Career Course at Fort Gordon. The course is a typical Army school with the usual blah blah about leadership and normal Army stuff. It also has a nice little section about how to operate Cisco routers and running Microsoft Exchange 2003.
2. The kids are all doing well in school. Carmen and Emily are going to a very nearby elementary school that is run like a prison. But, I guess most of the kids are being raised to act like criminals (ie, no discipline or respect), so its fitting. Amber is still being home-schooled and is learning about world history (Magellen and Cortez at the moment), is doing Geometery for math, is learning about the planets and solar system in science, and is learning about Spain for Geography. She has one week of classes and then tests on Fridays. Sometimes she tries hard and sometimes she doesn't - her grades reflect her effort if not her ability.
3. The elementary school - its in a poor-er part of town and has limited funding from the school district. The classrooms are poorly equipment for a school in the age we are in. The TVs don't have DVD players and computer access is extremely limited. The library is small and under-booked.
Sarahann has been doing some extreme volunteering at the school - initially just with Carmen's class, but is one of the very few (maybe 5) parent volunteers for the whole school. She has worked at the school book fair and her current project is decorating the halls outside some of the classrooms for Fall and Halloween. We are also trying to get donations of $25 so we can donate a DVD to each classroom. So far, we have received five donations.
4. No change on the original issue with the school-district and I've been too busy to stay on top of it. But, I havent given up yet.
5. Surprisingly, the mail boxes are still graffitti free. The "gang" is still in the area, and I think they were out casing the neighborhood the other night. One night last week we were sitting around the living room at about 11pm with the back sliding glass door open (to take advantage of the rare cool breeze) and we first saw a group of about 8-10 teenagers walk by - very slowly and they definately looked into our apartment. They immediately walked BACK by twice looking in. We took the appropriate precautions, but they never came back.
6. We haven't been able to go off-roading in awhile (except for a brief trapse through a small wooded area when we were on Fort Gordon looking for a good trick-or-treat spot). So, the Jeep is too clean and I can tell its getting fidgety - it seems to look for curbs or rocks to drive over. The majority of the off-road obstacles in the woods and forests around here are mud-related, and the Jeep isn't really set up for too deep of mud, but I think it'll do fine. The problem is that I don't have any way to get "unstuck" right now and no one to go off-roading with.
7. We have been able to go Geocaching and are up to 49 finds so far. The kids' travel bugs are moving around nicely. Amber's is in New Mexico, David's is in Wyoming, Emily's is in New Mexico, Illyana's is in Colorado and Carmen's is moving to Germany. I have a good route planned for next weekend that will take us to downtown Augusta and then out into some swamp-land.
8. Our next move should be up to the Portland, Oregon or Vancouever, Washington area and we will be there about 18 months while the Army pays me too much to get my Master's degree in Political Science. We should be leaving here in January and starting school in March. **Note the "SHOULD"s that are prevelant there - thats because with the Army, things are never 100% certain.
9. Current events:
a. Fires in California - Sad that so many people lost their homes. But, I think the more interesting thing is the fact that all of those people moved into the stadium (very reminscent of Katrina victims), but that they aren't all trying to kill each other and no one is dying. I think the reason for the dramatic differences is that the people in that part of California are more interested in being nice to others and making the best of the situation - taking control of their own lives, rather than letting the situation control them and only looking out for themselves. The victims in New Orleans had a "what is someone going to do for me" whereas the victims in California are being proactive to help each other. Yes, yes, bad me for not feeling sorry for Katrina victims two years after the fact. Two years is plenty to pick yourself up and move on.
b. Iraq - yup, still going on. Still sucks, but still needs to get taken care of.
c. Presidential race - If I were to make a wager, I'd put my money on Hillary, as much as I think she is the worst person for the job and will absolutely screw the country over. I don't know where my vote will go, but it definately will not be to her. Ever. Ever. Ever.
d. Bush - I think he's trying but is being misguided by his advisors. His administration has taken great strides in destroying the liberties of the people here and of absolutely disregarding the Constitution. For that, I hate this administration. But, I still think Hillary would be much much worse. The Patriot Act is complete and utter BS and I'm glad that at least some of it has been overturned by the courts. Wiretapping of US citizens is also BS, and so is torture and holding people as "enemy combatents" without trial or representation. The suspension of Habeous Corpus for any extended length of time, without a damn good reason is an affront to the Constitution and should be resisted at every opportunity.
e. The World Series - Go Rockies! I hope the Series is as exciting as the playoffs.
f. TV shows - waiting for Lost; watching Jeopardy!, Big Bang Theory, NCIS (occasionaly), Kid Nation (I dislike the "Beauty Queen" with a passion) and the one girl who danced for nickles in the first show is great. I'm glad Greg got the Gold Star so he can quit pouting about it every week.
g. The American dollar is worth less than the Canadian dollar and I think its hilarious that those Canadians are still having to pay the "Canadian" price on books! I'm sure there is a way to make some $$ on this little downturn of the American dollar, but I'm not sure what it is.
10. I have too many books that I need to read to even begin mentioning them.
11. I need to take the GRE soon. I hope I do alright...
12. The PS3 is better than the XBOX 360 and WII put together.
13. Isn't that enough already???
1. We're still down here in god-awful Georgia. I'm going through the Captain's Career Course at Fort Gordon. The course is a typical Army school with the usual blah blah about leadership and normal Army stuff. It also has a nice little section about how to operate Cisco routers and running Microsoft Exchange 2003.
2. The kids are all doing well in school. Carmen and Emily are going to a very nearby elementary school that is run like a prison. But, I guess most of the kids are being raised to act like criminals (ie, no discipline or respect), so its fitting. Amber is still being home-schooled and is learning about world history (Magellen and Cortez at the moment), is doing Geometery for math, is learning about the planets and solar system in science, and is learning about Spain for Geography. She has one week of classes and then tests on Fridays. Sometimes she tries hard and sometimes she doesn't - her grades reflect her effort if not her ability.
3. The elementary school - its in a poor-er part of town and has limited funding from the school district. The classrooms are poorly equipment for a school in the age we are in. The TVs don't have DVD players and computer access is extremely limited. The library is small and under-booked.
Sarahann has been doing some extreme volunteering at the school - initially just with Carmen's class, but is one of the very few (maybe 5) parent volunteers for the whole school. She has worked at the school book fair and her current project is decorating the halls outside some of the classrooms for Fall and Halloween. We are also trying to get donations of $25 so we can donate a DVD to each classroom. So far, we have received five donations.
4. No change on the original issue with the school-district and I've been too busy to stay on top of it. But, I havent given up yet.
5. Surprisingly, the mail boxes are still graffitti free. The "gang" is still in the area, and I think they were out casing the neighborhood the other night. One night last week we were sitting around the living room at about 11pm with the back sliding glass door open (to take advantage of the rare cool breeze) and we first saw a group of about 8-10 teenagers walk by - very slowly and they definately looked into our apartment. They immediately walked BACK by twice looking in. We took the appropriate precautions, but they never came back.
6. We haven't been able to go off-roading in awhile (except for a brief trapse through a small wooded area when we were on Fort Gordon looking for a good trick-or-treat spot). So, the Jeep is too clean and I can tell its getting fidgety - it seems to look for curbs or rocks to drive over. The majority of the off-road obstacles in the woods and forests around here are mud-related, and the Jeep isn't really set up for too deep of mud, but I think it'll do fine. The problem is that I don't have any way to get "unstuck" right now and no one to go off-roading with.
7. We have been able to go Geocaching and are up to 49 finds so far. The kids' travel bugs are moving around nicely. Amber's is in New Mexico, David's is in Wyoming, Emily's is in New Mexico, Illyana's is in Colorado and Carmen's is moving to Germany. I have a good route planned for next weekend that will take us to downtown Augusta and then out into some swamp-land.
8. Our next move should be up to the Portland, Oregon or Vancouever, Washington area and we will be there about 18 months while the Army pays me too much to get my Master's degree in Political Science. We should be leaving here in January and starting school in March. **Note the "SHOULD"s that are prevelant there - thats because with the Army, things are never 100% certain.
9. Current events:
a. Fires in California - Sad that so many people lost their homes. But, I think the more interesting thing is the fact that all of those people moved into the stadium (very reminscent of Katrina victims), but that they aren't all trying to kill each other and no one is dying. I think the reason for the dramatic differences is that the people in that part of California are more interested in being nice to others and making the best of the situation - taking control of their own lives, rather than letting the situation control them and only looking out for themselves. The victims in New Orleans had a "what is someone going to do for me" whereas the victims in California are being proactive to help each other. Yes, yes, bad me for not feeling sorry for Katrina victims two years after the fact. Two years is plenty to pick yourself up and move on.
b. Iraq - yup, still going on. Still sucks, but still needs to get taken care of.
c. Presidential race - If I were to make a wager, I'd put my money on Hillary, as much as I think she is the worst person for the job and will absolutely screw the country over. I don't know where my vote will go, but it definately will not be to her. Ever. Ever. Ever.
d. Bush - I think he's trying but is being misguided by his advisors. His administration has taken great strides in destroying the liberties of the people here and of absolutely disregarding the Constitution. For that, I hate this administration. But, I still think Hillary would be much much worse. The Patriot Act is complete and utter BS and I'm glad that at least some of it has been overturned by the courts. Wiretapping of US citizens is also BS, and so is torture and holding people as "enemy combatents" without trial or representation. The suspension of Habeous Corpus for any extended length of time, without a damn good reason is an affront to the Constitution and should be resisted at every opportunity.
e. The World Series - Go Rockies! I hope the Series is as exciting as the playoffs.
f. TV shows - waiting for Lost; watching Jeopardy!, Big Bang Theory, NCIS (occasionaly), Kid Nation (I dislike the "Beauty Queen" with a passion) and the one girl who danced for nickles in the first show is great. I'm glad Greg got the Gold Star so he can quit pouting about it every week.
g. The American dollar is worth less than the Canadian dollar and I think its hilarious that those Canadians are still having to pay the "Canadian" price on books! I'm sure there is a way to make some $$ on this little downturn of the American dollar, but I'm not sure what it is.
10. I have too many books that I need to read to even begin mentioning them.
11. I need to take the GRE soon. I hope I do alright...
12. The PS3 is better than the XBOX 360 and WII put together.
13. Isn't that enough already???
Sunday, October 7, 2007
I hate the "neighborhood."
I love baseball. I love watching, I love playing, I just love all of it. I regret that I haven't watched as much as I would have liked this year, but I have watched nearly all of the playoff games - and I love them! I love the excitement, the plays, the actions, the strategy and I love the rules. Yes, the rules. Its one of the reasons I love baseball so much! The rules are well defined - the base is X inches by X inches, the plate is SO wide, the bases are 90 feet apart. Everything has its dimensions and places. The players all follow the same set of rules and everything works out.
However, this year, I've noticed something for the first time that really pisses me off - the "neighborhood" unwritten rule, specifically as it is applied to a double-play. I didn't know it even had a name until my wife mentioned it.
In case you don't know what the unwritten neighborhood rule is, it goes something like this: according to the RULES (the written ones) during a short-stop to second base to first double play, the second baseman is REQUIRED to have the ball, touch the bag and then throw to first. The out is a direct result of the player with the ball touching the bag before the runner - actually TOUCHING the base IS required, not optional. Now, enter the "neighborhood" "rule" which is basically an agreement that the basebman doesn't actually have to TOUCH the bag, but just be near it. The intent behind the rule is fine - you don't want people getting hurt when they (the runner and the baseman) try to occupy the same space at the same time. The road to hell is paved with good intentions.
Watching these games, I've seen double-plays turned with the second baseman nowhere NEAR the bag, not hopping over it, not scooting by it, but just standing in the general vicinity of it. This is complete and utter BS. If the rules say you have to touch the damned bag, then by god, you should have to TOUCH the damned bag. The runners don't get to be safe by being NEAR the bag, and the outfielders can't ALMOST catch the ball - they actually have to perform the appropriate action.
This attitude that being "close enough" is good enough is one of the big problem that we face as a country. Everyone is content to be "in the neighborhood" of whatever and we aren't disciplining ourselves enough to actually finish the job we set out to do. We half ass things and then wonder why quality suffers. The "neighborhood" is NOT close enough. When my daughter is doing her math, if her answer isn't right but is in the "neighborhood" - ITS WRONG! 3+4=7. It doesn't equal six or eight.
I hate the "neighborhood." It is the bane of discipline and right answers. So, when you get the chance - try not to be in the neighborhood - just touch the base.
However, this year, I've noticed something for the first time that really pisses me off - the "neighborhood" unwritten rule, specifically as it is applied to a double-play. I didn't know it even had a name until my wife mentioned it.
In case you don't know what the unwritten neighborhood rule is, it goes something like this: according to the RULES (the written ones) during a short-stop to second base to first double play, the second baseman is REQUIRED to have the ball, touch the bag and then throw to first. The out is a direct result of the player with the ball touching the bag before the runner - actually TOUCHING the base IS required, not optional. Now, enter the "neighborhood" "rule" which is basically an agreement that the basebman doesn't actually have to TOUCH the bag, but just be near it. The intent behind the rule is fine - you don't want people getting hurt when they (the runner and the baseman) try to occupy the same space at the same time. The road to hell is paved with good intentions.
Watching these games, I've seen double-plays turned with the second baseman nowhere NEAR the bag, not hopping over it, not scooting by it, but just standing in the general vicinity of it. This is complete and utter BS. If the rules say you have to touch the damned bag, then by god, you should have to TOUCH the damned bag. The runners don't get to be safe by being NEAR the bag, and the outfielders can't ALMOST catch the ball - they actually have to perform the appropriate action.
This attitude that being "close enough" is good enough is one of the big problem that we face as a country. Everyone is content to be "in the neighborhood" of whatever and we aren't disciplining ourselves enough to actually finish the job we set out to do. We half ass things and then wonder why quality suffers. The "neighborhood" is NOT close enough. When my daughter is doing her math, if her answer isn't right but is in the "neighborhood" - ITS WRONG! 3+4=7. It doesn't equal six or eight.
I hate the "neighborhood." It is the bane of discipline and right answers. So, when you get the chance - try not to be in the neighborhood - just touch the base.
Friday, October 5, 2007
Open Letter to Motorcyclists
Dear Motorcycle Riders,
I appreciate your rights to drive on the road, just like everyone else. I believe in your rights to be safe on the road - or at least as safe as you can be with no protection going 60mph down the asphalt (and don't say that you wear all the protective gear, so you will be safe, please). I know that some people drive too close to you and don't always look close enough in their mirrors to see you. If you want loud pipes and believe they keep you safer - have at it.
But when one of your fellow riders cruises up the middle of two lanes, betweens dozens of stopped cars because of traffic jam or line, that guy screws with your whole "oppressed people" argument. That guy thinks that because he CAN drive between all the cars, he is entitled to. Is it because he feels he always gets disrespected by the quadra-wheeled people? I don't know, I don't care. As soon as that guy cruises on by, inches from my door, because he can, he hurts all of you and makes us quadra-wheelers upset and give us our justification for thinking that, at least some of you, deserves all the pain you get. Just because he can, doesn't mean he should - and its illegal. And when that guy not only zips by down the middle but then cuts someone (me) off, missing the front bumper by inches, we really don't like that either.
Just because you can, doesn't mean you should. I have a 4x4 Jeep that I am fairly certain can drive over any grassy median or dirt shoulder, hell, I could even drive into the woods to pass everyone - but I don't. Just because I can, doesn't mean I should or that its legal. We have rules of the road - if you want to be on the road, follow them like the rest of us.
The next time I see a biker cruising down the middle lane, I will scoot towards the middle - just to make it hard. Between my bumpers, the entire lane is mine, don't try to take it from me. I love my Jeep, but I'm pretty sure it'll take a hit from your bike better than your bike will.
I'm just saying, if you motorcyclists want respect from us, you must respect us also.
PS. To the one specific biker who rode up the middle lane and cut me off today - you are lucky - you missed by only a few inches. I'm not sorry I rode your ass up to the gate and I'm glad that the MPs took care of you. And I hope they didn't buy the BS line about how "you didn't know you couldn't do that." Didn't you take the motorcycle test to get your license? I'm pretty sure its in there.
I appreciate your rights to drive on the road, just like everyone else. I believe in your rights to be safe on the road - or at least as safe as you can be with no protection going 60mph down the asphalt (and don't say that you wear all the protective gear, so you will be safe, please). I know that some people drive too close to you and don't always look close enough in their mirrors to see you. If you want loud pipes and believe they keep you safer - have at it.
But when one of your fellow riders cruises up the middle of two lanes, betweens dozens of stopped cars because of traffic jam or line, that guy screws with your whole "oppressed people" argument. That guy thinks that because he CAN drive between all the cars, he is entitled to. Is it because he feels he always gets disrespected by the quadra-wheeled people? I don't know, I don't care. As soon as that guy cruises on by, inches from my door, because he can, he hurts all of you and makes us quadra-wheelers upset and give us our justification for thinking that, at least some of you, deserves all the pain you get. Just because he can, doesn't mean he should - and its illegal. And when that guy not only zips by down the middle but then cuts someone (me) off, missing the front bumper by inches, we really don't like that either.
Just because you can, doesn't mean you should. I have a 4x4 Jeep that I am fairly certain can drive over any grassy median or dirt shoulder, hell, I could even drive into the woods to pass everyone - but I don't. Just because I can, doesn't mean I should or that its legal. We have rules of the road - if you want to be on the road, follow them like the rest of us.
The next time I see a biker cruising down the middle lane, I will scoot towards the middle - just to make it hard. Between my bumpers, the entire lane is mine, don't try to take it from me. I love my Jeep, but I'm pretty sure it'll take a hit from your bike better than your bike will.
I'm just saying, if you motorcyclists want respect from us, you must respect us also.
PS. To the one specific biker who rode up the middle lane and cut me off today - you are lucky - you missed by only a few inches. I'm not sorry I rode your ass up to the gate and I'm glad that the MPs took care of you. And I hope they didn't buy the BS line about how "you didn't know you couldn't do that." Didn't you take the motorcycle test to get your license? I'm pretty sure its in there.
Do Something
I love it when people complain about the neighborhood they live in - and when you ask them whats wrong they tell you about the graffiti and garbage and stuff like that. Then, when you ask what they have done to help, they say nothing. If people aren't going to do something to help, then you have no basis to complain.
Why do I even mention it? Good question. I've usually lived in nice neighborhoods with little to no graffiti and a generally clean area. There has never been a need to do any clean up. Now, we've moved back to Augusta, Georgia and live in an apartment that is not exactly in the best part of town.
When we got here, the first thing I noticed was the gang graffiti on the mailboxes. There was also garbage all along the back fence of the complex - which our apartment looks out on. So, one of the first things we did was to clean up our section of the fence. I had the kids go out and pick up all the garbage that was right out back - and now it looks fine. The next project was the mailboxes - I think that if you leave graffiti up, it just encourages more and tells whoever is doing it that they can get away with it. So that was next.
We asked the apartment complex management to provide the spray paint, which they did, and we all went out to paint over the graffiti. Not long after we started painting over the graffiti, there were five or so teenage males that came out of a nearby apartment and walked slowly by, watching us as we painted. I have no doubt that they were the boys who did the original painting. We took pictures of the graffiti before we started and I also took pictures as we progressed and of the boys who were taking an interest in our anti-graffiti project. They walked back and forth until we ran out of paint - all of the graffiti was painted over, but the mailboxes were not a solid color. So, we halted our project for the day. We wholly expected our anti-graffiti painting to be regraffittied within a few days, or the weekend at the latest. Much to our surprise, no one tried to paint on it again. We requested and received more paint from the management and finished up the painting a couple of weeks later.
While we were finishing up the painting, people who were driving through the complex would slow down and watch what we were doing. All they could see from the road was some people behind the mailboxes spraypainting. As we were finishing up, one guy parked and walked around the mailboxes to see exactly what we were doing. As he walked around the side of the boxes, I could tell be the stern look on his face that we thought we were up to no good. I made eye contact with him and asked him how he was doing. He looked sternly at me and then at the back of the mailboxes. When he saw that we were painting over the graffiti and not making graffiti, his demeanor immediately changed and he said, "Oh, you're painting over the graffiti. Thanks." His tone was one of surprise and sincerity. I casually said, "We all have to do our part," and finished up the painting and went inside. He still seemed surprised. I don't think many people around here take much interest in anything much greater than survival.
We saved a little paint so that if the graffiti comes back, we can quickly remove it.
I know that by removing the graffiti we have made ourselves more of a target in the neighborhood, but I'm not really worried. Everything is insured and we can cover the deductible. As far as the safety of the family, we always watch the kids go to and come from school and they are never out of sight. The doors to the apartment are always locked at night (although they are not exactly "sturdy"). I go to PT early in the morning and come back at seemingly random times during the day, so there is no way to tell when we're home and when we're not. If someone makes the mistake of breaking into the house while we're asleep - they will quickly find themselves on the receiving end of some .40 caliber hollow points.
I wholly believe that if everyone would clean up their areas and maybe just a little bit outside of their area, everything would be much better for everyone. There are more good people in the world than bad people - but the bad people just do more to get noticed.
"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing." - Edmund Burke
Why do I even mention it? Good question. I've usually lived in nice neighborhoods with little to no graffiti and a generally clean area. There has never been a need to do any clean up. Now, we've moved back to Augusta, Georgia and live in an apartment that is not exactly in the best part of town.
When we got here, the first thing I noticed was the gang graffiti on the mailboxes. There was also garbage all along the back fence of the complex - which our apartment looks out on. So, one of the first things we did was to clean up our section of the fence. I had the kids go out and pick up all the garbage that was right out back - and now it looks fine. The next project was the mailboxes - I think that if you leave graffiti up, it just encourages more and tells whoever is doing it that they can get away with it. So that was next.
We asked the apartment complex management to provide the spray paint, which they did, and we all went out to paint over the graffiti. Not long after we started painting over the graffiti, there were five or so teenage males that came out of a nearby apartment and walked slowly by, watching us as we painted. I have no doubt that they were the boys who did the original painting. We took pictures of the graffiti before we started and I also took pictures as we progressed and of the boys who were taking an interest in our anti-graffiti project. They walked back and forth until we ran out of paint - all of the graffiti was painted over, but the mailboxes were not a solid color. So, we halted our project for the day. We wholly expected our anti-graffiti painting to be regraffittied within a few days, or the weekend at the latest. Much to our surprise, no one tried to paint on it again. We requested and received more paint from the management and finished up the painting a couple of weeks later.
While we were finishing up the painting, people who were driving through the complex would slow down and watch what we were doing. All they could see from the road was some people behind the mailboxes spraypainting. As we were finishing up, one guy parked and walked around the mailboxes to see exactly what we were doing. As he walked around the side of the boxes, I could tell be the stern look on his face that we thought we were up to no good. I made eye contact with him and asked him how he was doing. He looked sternly at me and then at the back of the mailboxes. When he saw that we were painting over the graffiti and not making graffiti, his demeanor immediately changed and he said, "Oh, you're painting over the graffiti. Thanks." His tone was one of surprise and sincerity. I casually said, "We all have to do our part," and finished up the painting and went inside. He still seemed surprised. I don't think many people around here take much interest in anything much greater than survival.
We saved a little paint so that if the graffiti comes back, we can quickly remove it.
I know that by removing the graffiti we have made ourselves more of a target in the neighborhood, but I'm not really worried. Everything is insured and we can cover the deductible. As far as the safety of the family, we always watch the kids go to and come from school and they are never out of sight. The doors to the apartment are always locked at night (although they are not exactly "sturdy"). I go to PT early in the morning and come back at seemingly random times during the day, so there is no way to tell when we're home and when we're not. If someone makes the mistake of breaking into the house while we're asleep - they will quickly find themselves on the receiving end of some .40 caliber hollow points.
I wholly believe that if everyone would clean up their areas and maybe just a little bit outside of their area, everything would be much better for everyone. There are more good people in the world than bad people - but the bad people just do more to get noticed.
"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing." - Edmund Burke
Homeschooling
Because of the whole RCBOE and illegal searching deal, we have pulled our oldest daughter out of the school district and are now homeschooling her. Of the kids we have, she is the only one who we can do this with because she has the ability to work on her own. If the younger ones were to be homeschooled, it would be a mess - they can not be controlled outside of a regular school environment.
Our homeschooling curriculum consists of classes in History, Language Arts, Math, Vocabulary, Spelling, Geography, Science, PE, Sign Language and Home Economics. She is required by the state to have school for four hours a day - she gets more than that. She starts school at around 0900 and is usually done by 3ish - much like a regular school day. However, when she was actually in school, she would leave the house at 0800 to catch the bus and not get back until 1700 on the bus. At public school, she only had five classes and had to learn at the pace of the slowest kid - which down here, is pretty slow. Most of her time was spent waiting for others or the bus. Waste, waste, waste.
So far, she has learned:
History - the origins of man from cavemen through Alexander the Great (so far)
Math - we just finished up Adding, Subtracting, Multiplying and Dividing fractions.
Science- learned about what the earth is made of, what the atmopshere is made of and the moon and its phases.
Geography - we have go in depth into Ethiopia, Egypt, and Greece.
Language Arts - the basics of english, the main parts of a sentence and paragraph and she has done a book report. She is now reading "Call of the Wild"
Spelling and Vocab - the basics, spelling words, learning new words, etc
PE - she runs every other day or does Yoga. She will have a PE test at the end of the quarter - next weekend.
Sign Language and Home Ec are done on an as-available basis - she helps with the household chores, cooking, cleaning, sewing, etc and learns a little bit more sign language every few days.
She is doing really good in some subjects and not so well in others.
Her math is what she is doing the worst in, but I think that isn't due to any inability or lack of understanding, but rather a lack of focus to do good. She just whips through the problems and makes silly mistakes.
I think part of the issue with her and us and homeschool is that we see every grade and every piece of work she does now. She can't slip on one assignment and have us not see it. Before, when she was in school, we really only saw the report card at the end of the quarter and made decisions based on that. Now, we see every week how she is doing and adjust things accordingly - sometimes in her favor and sometimes not. If she is doing well, we move on faster - if she isn't we do more of the same until she understands.
Our homeschooling curriculum consists of classes in History, Language Arts, Math, Vocabulary, Spelling, Geography, Science, PE, Sign Language and Home Economics. She is required by the state to have school for four hours a day - she gets more than that. She starts school at around 0900 and is usually done by 3ish - much like a regular school day. However, when she was actually in school, she would leave the house at 0800 to catch the bus and not get back until 1700 on the bus. At public school, she only had five classes and had to learn at the pace of the slowest kid - which down here, is pretty slow. Most of her time was spent waiting for others or the bus. Waste, waste, waste.
So far, she has learned:
History - the origins of man from cavemen through Alexander the Great (so far)
Math - we just finished up Adding, Subtracting, Multiplying and Dividing fractions.
Science- learned about what the earth is made of, what the atmopshere is made of and the moon and its phases.
Geography - we have go in depth into Ethiopia, Egypt, and Greece.
Language Arts - the basics of english, the main parts of a sentence and paragraph and she has done a book report. She is now reading "Call of the Wild"
Spelling and Vocab - the basics, spelling words, learning new words, etc
PE - she runs every other day or does Yoga. She will have a PE test at the end of the quarter - next weekend.
Sign Language and Home Ec are done on an as-available basis - she helps with the household chores, cooking, cleaning, sewing, etc and learns a little bit more sign language every few days.
She is doing really good in some subjects and not so well in others.
Her math is what she is doing the worst in, but I think that isn't due to any inability or lack of understanding, but rather a lack of focus to do good. She just whips through the problems and makes silly mistakes.
I think part of the issue with her and us and homeschool is that we see every grade and every piece of work she does now. She can't slip on one assignment and have us not see it. Before, when she was in school, we really only saw the report card at the end of the quarter and made decisions based on that. Now, we see every week how she is doing and adjust things accordingly - sometimes in her favor and sometimes not. If she is doing well, we move on faster - if she isn't we do more of the same until she understands.
PTA
When we first came to Georgia and signed the kids up for school, we also got ourselves involved in the PTA program. The first meeting was a few weeks ago. I was a little bit stunned as to how it played out.
I'm curious as to what the purpose of the PTA is - really, I haven't a clue. I suppose that a PTA is there to support the school and the kids that go to the school. From the budget that this PTA put out, it looks like the kids in the school earn money for the PTA through the sales of stuff (chocolates and wrapping paper, etc) and through collecting box-tops and all that. I thought that the box-top money went to the school itself, but apparently, it goes to the PTA. So, what does the PTA DO exactly? Good question. From their budget it appears as though they send volunteers to Atlanta for training and buy parting gifts for teachers and administrators. Also, I don't know what the difference is between this year and last years budget, but last year they had a $2700 surplus - THIS year they are under by $2000. I wonder what happened?
Personally, I think they should cut out the teacher gifts until they are back within their budget and even then, maybe they should be looking to improve the school and educational pieces rather than spending over $1000 on gifts.
If I were going to be here longer, I would worry more about it. But, I'm not sure how much I could do then anyway. It seems like the people here are just content with how things are and are not at all interested in making things better.
Funny thing about moving around more than the average person - you see what is good and what is bad about numerous aspects of society in different parts of the country. In Colorado, the teachers cared about the kids and liked their jobs. The school was clean and orderly and the kids liked going. Here, the school is more like a prison. At the end of the day, a woman tell which kids to go where over a PA system. Kids are subjected to random searches as they get off the bus. My kids, who usually love school, don't want to go!
I digress. At the next PTA meeting, I think they will here more about what they are doing wrong.
I'm curious as to what the purpose of the PTA is - really, I haven't a clue. I suppose that a PTA is there to support the school and the kids that go to the school. From the budget that this PTA put out, it looks like the kids in the school earn money for the PTA through the sales of stuff (chocolates and wrapping paper, etc) and through collecting box-tops and all that. I thought that the box-top money went to the school itself, but apparently, it goes to the PTA. So, what does the PTA DO exactly? Good question. From their budget it appears as though they send volunteers to Atlanta for training and buy parting gifts for teachers and administrators. Also, I don't know what the difference is between this year and last years budget, but last year they had a $2700 surplus - THIS year they are under by $2000. I wonder what happened?
Personally, I think they should cut out the teacher gifts until they are back within their budget and even then, maybe they should be looking to improve the school and educational pieces rather than spending over $1000 on gifts.
If I were going to be here longer, I would worry more about it. But, I'm not sure how much I could do then anyway. It seems like the people here are just content with how things are and are not at all interested in making things better.
Funny thing about moving around more than the average person - you see what is good and what is bad about numerous aspects of society in different parts of the country. In Colorado, the teachers cared about the kids and liked their jobs. The school was clean and orderly and the kids liked going. Here, the school is more like a prison. At the end of the day, a woman tell which kids to go where over a PA system. Kids are subjected to random searches as they get off the bus. My kids, who usually love school, don't want to go!
I digress. At the next PTA meeting, I think they will here more about what they are doing wrong.
Sunday, August 19, 2007
Getting Somewhere
Now that we have decided that we will homeschool the oldest daughter - gods help us - we finally received some response from the school district regarding the situation that prompted us to consider it.
Below is Superintendent Bedden's response that I believe to be genuine and I appreciate very much:
"Capt. Zeski:
This is the first I am hearing about this situation. I am quit familiar with the search and seizure guidelines since my dissertation focus was school law.
I will make sure you hear from someone in the leadership regarding this situation ASAP.
I ask that you be patient and also remember that just like the Army, we actually do have a chain of command. While I am not sure where your request made it in the central office, I will track it down.
Sorry for the inconvience."
He does seem be someone who is reasonable and able to be worked with. So far, he is the only person in the district that has seemed so.
Below is Superintendent Bedden's response that I believe to be genuine and I appreciate very much:
"Capt. Zeski:
This is the first I am hearing about this situation. I am quit familiar with the search and seizure guidelines since my dissertation focus was school law.
I will make sure you hear from someone in the leadership regarding this situation ASAP.
I ask that you be patient and also remember that just like the Army, we actually do have a chain of command. While I am not sure where your request made it in the central office, I will track it down.
Sorry for the inconvience."
He does seem be someone who is reasonable and able to be worked with. So far, he is the only person in the district that has seemed so.
Saturday, August 18, 2007
Issues with the Richmond County School District
Rather than rewrite something I already wrote, here's the letter I sent to the Superintendent of the Richmond County School District:
"Superintendant Bedden,
Before I get into my issue, let me tell you a little bit about myself.
I am a Soldier. I am a Captain in the United States Army. My job is to support and defend the Constitution of the United States of America. I have served in combat operations in numerous locales in the Middle East.
I am a father and a husband - my family comes first. I do everything within the limits of my power to protect them. I watch my children; I see what they do online and at the playground. I allow my oldest daughter, Amber, to carry a cell phone for emergencies and also because it is embedded with a GPS locator that enables me to see where she is at any times. I know that the possibilities of anything happening to her on the way to, from, or at school are not high – but they do exist.
I am sure you are aware of the very recent attempt made to kidnap a 10 year old girl from a school bus stop area. This situation is exactly why I have a GPS enabled phone that I insist my daughter keep on her person at all times.
That is who I am and what I do.
Now for the issue at hand:
On 15 August, 2007, my daughter, Amber, was randomly picked out for a search of her person and bags as soon as she got off the bus. There was no suspicion of any wrong-doing or contraband. During the illegal search, she voluntarily handed over her cell phone and explained to Officer Ward, the searching officer, why she had it and that it was at my express order. She knows to follow the orders of law-enforcement officials and did so.
When Officer Ward called me and informed me about the situation, I waited until my other children were home from school and went down to Langford Middle School to talk with him about the situation and how I could get my property back. Officer Ward said that he could not release my property to me and that it would have to be released by the Superintendent’s Office. He was professional and courteous at all times and provided me with the information I needed in order to contact your office.
I picked up Amber from the school at that time because school was over and proceeded directly to the Richmond County Department of Education building. I entered the building and was addressed by the Public Safety officer at the front desk. I informed him of my desire to speak to someone in your office and was asked why. I explained the situation and he flatly said, “Confiscated cell phones are held for 365 days.” I again requested to speak with someone in the Superintendent’s Office and instead was directed to the Public Safety office down the hall.
Once in the Public Safety office I spoke with the receptionist and explained the situation. She also told me flatly about the “365-day confiscation” policy. I was then escorted to the office of Captain Ted Brown.
I again explained the situation to Captain Brown who told me, in addition to the “365 policy,” that there are signs outside of each school stating that all students consent to searches by coming onto school property. I did not remember if there had been or hadn’t been, so I did not comment on that at the time. Captain Brown explained that he could do nothing and could not return my phone to me. I explained that I realized he could do nothing which is why I had wanted to speak with someone in the Superintendent’s Office. He said that the Superintendent couldn’t do anything because it was a school board policy.
Once I left Captain Brown’s office I attempted to make an appointment to speak with you or someone in your office. The voice-mail I was transferred to was full, so I tried again and spoke with Candy who took my name and phone number and told me that either yourself or the Deputy Superintendent would call when the meeting was over. I did not receive a call that night.
After leaving the District Offices I went back to Langford Middle School to verify was Captain Brown had said about the signs. As it turns out, there are no signs indicating a consent to search by coming on school property at either Langford Middle School nor Copeland Elementary (where my other children attend school). I took pictures of the lack of signs.
While I waited for a phone call from your office, I began researching my rights and my daughter’s rights. I am now considering pursuing a case against the Richmond County School District and Board of Education for violating my daughter’s Fourth Amendment Right under the Constitution of the United States to be secure in her person and property.
I called again on Friday morning and Friday afternoon and was told by a cordial receptionist that she had given my message and request to call to Mr. Thompson. She also said that she would reissue the request for me. She still had my name and phone number on hand and repeated it back to me. I did not receive any calls from your office on Friday.
When Officer Ward first stopped my daughter as part of a completely “random” search without cause of reason to be suspect that my daughter had done anything wrong, he – and the district by authorizing him to do so – executed an illegal and unlawful search of my daughter and her possessions. During that search, he confiscated her cell phone. It is my contention that because the initial search was illegal, all items confiscated at that time were seized unlawfully.
The United States Supreme Court has made it clear that the “Fourth Amendment applies to searches conducted by public school officials because ‘school officials act as representatives of the State, not merely as surrogates for the parents.’” It also stated that, “the school setting requires some easing of the restrictions to which searches by public authorities are ordinarily subject.” So, if Officer Ward was acting as a school official he would have had a lower standard of suspicion to execute a search, however, he would still need “reasonable grounds for suspecting that the search will turn up evidence that the student has violated or is violating either the law or the rules of the school.” As this was, admittedly, a completely “random” search, there was clearly no reasonable grounds for suspecting that the search would turn up anything. If, however, Officer Ward was acting as a law enforcement official, and NOT a School Official, the burden of having some probable cause would be even greater than as a school official.
Either way, the search was unlawful and was a violation of my daughter’s Constitutional Rights. I am fairly certain that the Richmond County School District is also subject to the laws of the State of Georgia wherein the Constitution of Georgia states that, “the right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects against unreasonable searches and seizures shall not be violated; and no warrant shall issue except upon probable cause supported by oath or affirmation particularly describing the place or places to be searched and the persons or things to be seized.” Again, the District is in violation of the Constitution of the State of Georgia.
During the search, my daughter’s cell phone was confiscated by Officer Ward of the Public Safety Department of the Richmond County Board of Education. If the Public Safety Department is an actual law-enforcement agency in the state of Georgia, then the following Georgia Code applies:
Title 17
O.C.G.A. § 17-5-2 (2007)
An inventory of all instruments, articles, or things seized in a search without a search warrant shall be given to the person arrested and a copy thereof delivered to the judicial officer before whom the person arrested is taken. If the person arrested is released without a charge being preferred against him, all instruments, articles, or things seized, other than contraband or stolen property, shall be returned to him upon release.
As my daughter was not charged with any crime, my property should be returned as it is not contraband to anyone except the school district which does not have the authority to deprive me of my property.
I hope that we can resolve this matter without it progressing into a bigger incident. I started at the bottom of the chain, giving every level of authority the opportunity to rectify the situation. At this stage, I am running out of people to talk to.
In order to resolve this amicably, all I am asking for is an apology from the School Board or its representative, to my daughter for infringing on her Constitutional Rights; a statement by the School Board clarifying the authority of the Public Safety in specific regards to “random” searches; immediate return of my property; and a waiver so that my daughter can keep her cell phone in her school bag in the “silent” possession.
If we are unable to come to a satisfactory and timely conclusion, my next contact will be with the State of Georgia Board of Education, the Richmond County Sheriff’s Department and the ACLU.
I appreciate your timely response.
Thanks,
Bryan XXXXX
Captain, Signal Corps
United States Army"
I swear, I'm THIS close to home-schooling the kids. Even if its just so that the school district loses money by them not being there.
"Superintendant Bedden,
Before I get into my issue, let me tell you a little bit about myself.
I am a Soldier. I am a Captain in the United States Army. My job is to support and defend the Constitution of the United States of America. I have served in combat operations in numerous locales in the Middle East.
I am a father and a husband - my family comes first. I do everything within the limits of my power to protect them. I watch my children; I see what they do online and at the playground. I allow my oldest daughter, Amber, to carry a cell phone for emergencies and also because it is embedded with a GPS locator that enables me to see where she is at any times. I know that the possibilities of anything happening to her on the way to, from, or at school are not high – but they do exist.
I am sure you are aware of the very recent attempt made to kidnap a 10 year old girl from a school bus stop area. This situation is exactly why I have a GPS enabled phone that I insist my daughter keep on her person at all times.
That is who I am and what I do.
Now for the issue at hand:
On 15 August, 2007, my daughter, Amber, was randomly picked out for a search of her person and bags as soon as she got off the bus. There was no suspicion of any wrong-doing or contraband. During the illegal search, she voluntarily handed over her cell phone and explained to Officer Ward, the searching officer, why she had it and that it was at my express order. She knows to follow the orders of law-enforcement officials and did so.
When Officer Ward called me and informed me about the situation, I waited until my other children were home from school and went down to Langford Middle School to talk with him about the situation and how I could get my property back. Officer Ward said that he could not release my property to me and that it would have to be released by the Superintendent’s Office. He was professional and courteous at all times and provided me with the information I needed in order to contact your office.
I picked up Amber from the school at that time because school was over and proceeded directly to the Richmond County Department of Education building. I entered the building and was addressed by the Public Safety officer at the front desk. I informed him of my desire to speak to someone in your office and was asked why. I explained the situation and he flatly said, “Confiscated cell phones are held for 365 days.” I again requested to speak with someone in the Superintendent’s Office and instead was directed to the Public Safety office down the hall.
Once in the Public Safety office I spoke with the receptionist and explained the situation. She also told me flatly about the “365-day confiscation” policy. I was then escorted to the office of Captain Ted Brown.
I again explained the situation to Captain Brown who told me, in addition to the “365 policy,” that there are signs outside of each school stating that all students consent to searches by coming onto school property. I did not remember if there had been or hadn’t been, so I did not comment on that at the time. Captain Brown explained that he could do nothing and could not return my phone to me. I explained that I realized he could do nothing which is why I had wanted to speak with someone in the Superintendent’s Office. He said that the Superintendent couldn’t do anything because it was a school board policy.
Once I left Captain Brown’s office I attempted to make an appointment to speak with you or someone in your office. The voice-mail I was transferred to was full, so I tried again and spoke with Candy who took my name and phone number and told me that either yourself or the Deputy Superintendent would call when the meeting was over. I did not receive a call that night.
After leaving the District Offices I went back to Langford Middle School to verify was Captain Brown had said about the signs. As it turns out, there are no signs indicating a consent to search by coming on school property at either Langford Middle School nor Copeland Elementary (where my other children attend school). I took pictures of the lack of signs.
While I waited for a phone call from your office, I began researching my rights and my daughter’s rights. I am now considering pursuing a case against the Richmond County School District and Board of Education for violating my daughter’s Fourth Amendment Right under the Constitution of the United States to be secure in her person and property.
I called again on Friday morning and Friday afternoon and was told by a cordial receptionist that she had given my message and request to call to Mr. Thompson. She also said that she would reissue the request for me. She still had my name and phone number on hand and repeated it back to me. I did not receive any calls from your office on Friday.
When Officer Ward first stopped my daughter as part of a completely “random” search without cause of reason to be suspect that my daughter had done anything wrong, he – and the district by authorizing him to do so – executed an illegal and unlawful search of my daughter and her possessions. During that search, he confiscated her cell phone. It is my contention that because the initial search was illegal, all items confiscated at that time were seized unlawfully.
The United States Supreme Court has made it clear that the “Fourth Amendment applies to searches conducted by public school officials because ‘school officials act as representatives of the State, not merely as surrogates for the parents.’” It also stated that, “the school setting requires some easing of the restrictions to which searches by public authorities are ordinarily subject.” So, if Officer Ward was acting as a school official he would have had a lower standard of suspicion to execute a search, however, he would still need “reasonable grounds for suspecting that the search will turn up evidence that the student has violated or is violating either the law or the rules of the school.” As this was, admittedly, a completely “random” search, there was clearly no reasonable grounds for suspecting that the search would turn up anything. If, however, Officer Ward was acting as a law enforcement official, and NOT a School Official, the burden of having some probable cause would be even greater than as a school official.
Either way, the search was unlawful and was a violation of my daughter’s Constitutional Rights. I am fairly certain that the Richmond County School District is also subject to the laws of the State of Georgia wherein the Constitution of Georgia states that, “the right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects against unreasonable searches and seizures shall not be violated; and no warrant shall issue except upon probable cause supported by oath or affirmation particularly describing the place or places to be searched and the persons or things to be seized.” Again, the District is in violation of the Constitution of the State of Georgia.
During the search, my daughter’s cell phone was confiscated by Officer Ward of the Public Safety Department of the Richmond County Board of Education. If the Public Safety Department is an actual law-enforcement agency in the state of Georgia, then the following Georgia Code applies:
Title 17
O.C.G.A. § 17-5-2 (2007)
An inventory of all instruments, articles, or things seized in a search without a search warrant shall be given to the person arrested and a copy thereof delivered to the judicial officer before whom the person arrested is taken. If the person arrested is released without a charge being preferred against him, all instruments, articles, or things seized, other than contraband or stolen property, shall be returned to him upon release.
As my daughter was not charged with any crime, my property should be returned as it is not contraband to anyone except the school district which does not have the authority to deprive me of my property.
I hope that we can resolve this matter without it progressing into a bigger incident. I started at the bottom of the chain, giving every level of authority the opportunity to rectify the situation. At this stage, I am running out of people to talk to.
In order to resolve this amicably, all I am asking for is an apology from the School Board or its representative, to my daughter for infringing on her Constitutional Rights; a statement by the School Board clarifying the authority of the Public Safety in specific regards to “random” searches; immediate return of my property; and a waiver so that my daughter can keep her cell phone in her school bag in the “silent” possession.
If we are unable to come to a satisfactory and timely conclusion, my next contact will be with the State of Georgia Board of Education, the Richmond County Sheriff’s Department and the ACLU.
I appreciate your timely response.
Thanks,
Bryan XXXXX
Captain, Signal Corps
United States Army"
I swear, I'm THIS close to home-schooling the kids. Even if its just so that the school district loses money by them not being there.
Thursday, August 16, 2007
Stupid Verizon
I upgraded my oldest daughter's phone to an LG Chocolate so that I would be able to install the "chaperon" service from Verizon and be able to track her and make sure she's going where she's supposed to and isn't going where she isn't supposed to.
When I first added it to her phone, they asked what phone I wanted to be the "parent" phone - and I just picked my phone - no biggie. I never planned to check her location from my phone, so I didn't care. I knew my phone wasn't capable of installing the parent software, and neither was my wife's. No biggie - I would just check on her from the computer.
When I tried to activate the software on my daughter's phone it gave me an error message and I was too impatient to actually READ the message. I tried it a couple more times and called then called Verizon for help - my mistake. They said I HAD to have the parent software installed first. Grr. "That's stupid," I thought, but who am I to argue with a Verizon tech? So, I gave up temporarily.
Once we got to Georgia, my daughter was taking forever to get home on the bus - and I worry easy. I really really wanted to use that tracking system. When she finally got home I took her phone and tried activating it, even though the Verizon people said it wouldn't work. This time, I READ the error and realized that I just had to activate the "Location On" on the phone. I did that, not expecting it to work, but much to my surprise it did! Whoo hoo! I was able to view the phone's location without a problem. I quickly set up zones and now its great. I get a text message when she leaves the area of the apartment complex on her way to school and I get another one when she gets to school. Then on the way back, I get a text when she leaves the school area and when she gets back in the apartment area. I love it. Well worth the $10 a month and substantially cheaper than an actual GPS tracking system. Much much cheaper. And just as effective.
When I first added it to her phone, they asked what phone I wanted to be the "parent" phone - and I just picked my phone - no biggie. I never planned to check her location from my phone, so I didn't care. I knew my phone wasn't capable of installing the parent software, and neither was my wife's. No biggie - I would just check on her from the computer.
When I tried to activate the software on my daughter's phone it gave me an error message and I was too impatient to actually READ the message. I tried it a couple more times and called then called Verizon for help - my mistake. They said I HAD to have the parent software installed first. Grr. "That's stupid," I thought, but who am I to argue with a Verizon tech? So, I gave up temporarily.
Once we got to Georgia, my daughter was taking forever to get home on the bus - and I worry easy. I really really wanted to use that tracking system. When she finally got home I took her phone and tried activating it, even though the Verizon people said it wouldn't work. This time, I READ the error and realized that I just had to activate the "Location On" on the phone. I did that, not expecting it to work, but much to my surprise it did! Whoo hoo! I was able to view the phone's location without a problem. I quickly set up zones and now its great. I get a text message when she leaves the area of the apartment complex on her way to school and I get another one when she gets to school. Then on the way back, I get a text when she leaves the school area and when she gets back in the apartment area. I love it. Well worth the $10 a month and substantially cheaper than an actual GPS tracking system. Much much cheaper. And just as effective.
Back to School
The kids all started school on Monday. I have to say that so far, I'm not impressed with the school system here. Even the Kindergarten, which are usually bright and cheery, seemed dismal and almost depressing when we visited yesterday. I don't know why, it just seemed that way. The elementary school looks like a kiddie warehouse - although it isn't packed with kids - the ceilings are bare, exposed wiring runs from room to room. It looks like the school district just doesn't care enough to actually FINISH fixing the school. Hell, the other day we went in and they were still painting the doors. You'd think that be something that was done BEFORE all the elementary school kids came back to school.
The oldest daughter is going to middle school - and she takes the bus every day. The bus is not exactly on-time all the time and in the first three days of school, she was almost late twice. She got to choose two electives to take this quarter or term or semester, whatever it is, and she chose Spanish and something else. For her first homework, she is supposed to answer these questions about Spain - and the answers clearly need to come from a book that she says the teacher won't let them bring home. I looked all over for the teacher on the school page only to find out that he isn't even listed. So, I do the next best thing, I begin searching online for the book. As it turns out, her book IS online but the teacher is supposed to give them a username and password. Which he didn't. Talk about setting the kids up for failure. So, I dug a little deeper into the WWW and found someone who put THEIR user name and password up for everyone to see. I used that and viola we were in. So, now she can do her homework.
Also, seeing as though Georgia is a highly religious state, my daughter has already taken a little flak for wearing her 5-pointed star at school. Not flak from the teachers or administration (which we wouldn't tolerate), but flak from other kids because she doesn't believe in hell and the boogey-man under the ground. Well, that's just not fair or right, so I think we're going to begin giving her a little history lesson every once in awhile about the Bible and what it says so she isn't defenseless out there against the sheeple who think they are Christians because they go to church every week.
Normally, I wouldn't tell my girls what to believe or how to believe it, or even that someone else's belief wasn't right - after all, its everyone's choice to make. But, when people are harassing her and can't seem to keep it to themselves, then it only seems fair to give her the other side of the story than what she's hearing from the kids at school. She's a tough girl and can handle it - I just think she deserves a little help if she wants it.
Moving
We recently made a move from Fort Carson, Colorado to Augusta, Georgia. We don't particularly enjoy the South, but we have to come here so I can take some advanced classes for my Army.
On the way here, there was an accident in the opposite lane of traffic from us. It was hard to see, but it looked like someone else who was moving had a very bad day. There were toys and boxes all over and it looked like a moving truck had burned up (picture). As it turns out, it was much worse than that. Apparently, it WAS a family that was moving and they were headed east on the same road as us. Something happened to the rental truck and he crossed the grassy median and crashed head on into a semi-truck. Everyone in the accident was killed. The wife of the rental truck driver was following behind and saw the whole thing. Ouch.
Other than that incident, the drive across the country was uneventful - even pulling a car loaded with crap behind the Jeep. Our apartment was waiting for us when we arrived and the first day we got here we were able to get the kids registered for school and get groceries and we even managed to unload the car, get it weighed empty on the trailer and then turn in the trailer. I was concerned because I didn't want to have the trailer stolen while we waited to turn it in. Not very trusting I suppose.
Belated Update
Yeah, yeah, so its been awhile - geez, we've taken a few vacations and moved across the country, cut us some slack. As it turns out, after the first few incidences, monitoring the oldest girl online isn't as hard or as entertaining as I thought it would be. She pretty much follows the rules - sometimes needs a little nudge in the right direction, but she knows that I watch everything and will pounce on her if she steps out of line.
She's still doing the Zwinky thing and tried to get an IMVU account - which was swiftly dealt with, and was less painful than it could have been. When I told her "no" and to uninstall it, she did without a question. Later on, she asked why and I told her that it was too sexually oriented for her. She said, "oh" and went on her way. Now, whenever her little online buddies ask about IMVU, she says she doesn't have one and if they ask why, she'll tell them the same thing I told her. Good girl.
In addition to the Zwinky, a couple of her Zwinky friends are on MSN Messenger and she talks to them on there too. One of them says he's "Pete" from Fall Out Boy - yeah, right. I told my daughter that if he WAS the guy he says he is, she should get some back stage passes to their next local concert. She doesn't really think its him, but she wants to. I have to admit that the guy and his friends are not giving up the act without a fight. Its been awhile now and they still talk about the last concert or the hotel or they have to go practice. Sometimes his "girfriend" gets on and says that he's out on the tour and so isn't logged in - and she even seems a little jealous that some other girl is talking to him.
She's still doing the Zwinky thing and tried to get an IMVU account - which was swiftly dealt with, and was less painful than it could have been. When I told her "no" and to uninstall it, she did without a question. Later on, she asked why and I told her that it was too sexually oriented for her. She said, "oh" and went on her way. Now, whenever her little online buddies ask about IMVU, she says she doesn't have one and if they ask why, she'll tell them the same thing I told her. Good girl.
In addition to the Zwinky, a couple of her Zwinky friends are on MSN Messenger and she talks to them on there too. One of them says he's "Pete" from Fall Out Boy - yeah, right. I told my daughter that if he WAS the guy he says he is, she should get some back stage passes to their next local concert. She doesn't really think its him, but she wants to. I have to admit that the guy and his friends are not giving up the act without a fight. Its been awhile now and they still talk about the last concert or the hotel or they have to go practice. Sometimes his "girfriend" gets on and says that he's out on the tour and so isn't logged in - and she even seems a little jealous that some other girl is talking to him.
Saturday, June 23, 2007
Back from Camp
Well, we picked up the minions (the two that went to camp) and headed to Washington to visit family and pick up the other two kids from up there. So, now we have a total of five in the house.
While two of my girls were at camp, the third was raising hell at home and what I thought would be a peaceful time was actually MORE stressful than when all three are here. I think when they are here, they each bug each other, but without sisters around, the littlest one only had us to bug – and I think I covered all that below, but it doesn’t hurt to reiterate it.
On the way back from WA, we stopped in Yellowstone to see the sights and camped out in the Grand Tetons for a night also. The camping was fun and the kids got to swim in a lake and we had a mini-birthday party for the newly-turned 11 year old. She is probably one of the most spoiled 11 year olds in the world. I think she got damned near everything she wanted for her birthday – including an LG Chocolate cell phone and a PSP.
She doesn’t act as spoiled as she is, which is good, and she actually seems to sometimes care about some people besides herself from time to time. Sometimes she actually responds in the first couple of times we call her and even periodically does what she is asked BEFORE we have to threaten to turn off her internet.
She made a little boo-boo on the internet yesterday and gave out her phone number in a chat room. I’ve checked google and the reverse directories and I know that if the number is searched it will never come back to her because its in my name, and because I check her phone records, I’ll know if she starts getting any odd calls. I gave her a good talking to about giving out personal information online and all that and I warned her that if she does it again, she’ll be off the internet. I hope she listens.
Actually, reading her conversations and chats online makes me feel better about how (im)mature she is. I see from her chats that she really IS still an 11 year old girl with silly 11 year old thoughts. I’m seeing that her mind isn’t as developed as her body (thank whatever gods you may or may not believe in!). I’m thankful that she is still a kid and her online activities are showing that. She acts older in public, but online, she is still a kid. And because I can see what others are saying, I know that she’s being a good girl and leaving any conversations that start to get out of hand.
While two of my girls were at camp, the third was raising hell at home and what I thought would be a peaceful time was actually MORE stressful than when all three are here. I think when they are here, they each bug each other, but without sisters around, the littlest one only had us to bug – and I think I covered all that below, but it doesn’t hurt to reiterate it.
On the way back from WA, we stopped in Yellowstone to see the sights and camped out in the Grand Tetons for a night also. The camping was fun and the kids got to swim in a lake and we had a mini-birthday party for the newly-turned 11 year old. She is probably one of the most spoiled 11 year olds in the world. I think she got damned near everything she wanted for her birthday – including an LG Chocolate cell phone and a PSP.
She doesn’t act as spoiled as she is, which is good, and she actually seems to sometimes care about some people besides herself from time to time. Sometimes she actually responds in the first couple of times we call her and even periodically does what she is asked BEFORE we have to threaten to turn off her internet.
She made a little boo-boo on the internet yesterday and gave out her phone number in a chat room. I’ve checked google and the reverse directories and I know that if the number is searched it will never come back to her because its in my name, and because I check her phone records, I’ll know if she starts getting any odd calls. I gave her a good talking to about giving out personal information online and all that and I warned her that if she does it again, she’ll be off the internet. I hope she listens.
Actually, reading her conversations and chats online makes me feel better about how (im)mature she is. I see from her chats that she really IS still an 11 year old girl with silly 11 year old thoughts. I’m seeing that her mind isn’t as developed as her body (thank whatever gods you may or may not believe in!). I’m thankful that she is still a kid and her online activities are showing that. She acts older in public, but online, she is still a kid. And because I can see what others are saying, I know that she’s being a good girl and leaving any conversations that start to get out of hand.
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Getting Back on the Horse
So, we got the call today from the Girl Scout Camp. It seems that Ember fell off a horse. She was not hurt too bad and picked herself back up and, after a little reassurance, got back on the horse. So, it was a good thing. She’s a tough girl, but sometimes her pride overrides her reason and she doesn’t like to take help from anyone. But, the Camp lady said that she was fine now and running around and playing – so she should be ok.
I’m actually glad that she fell off the horse. We were concerned about both of the kids that are away and I know that I miss them – crazy as it sounds. After thinking about it, I realized that this is the longest that I’ve gone without talking to them, and I miss talking to them and hearing what crazy crap they have to say. Even when I deployed to Iraq, I was able to call home a couple times a day – your tax dollars at work!
But, if they’re having fun, playing with other kids, maybe some of the real Girl Scout kids will rub off on them. I have a suspicion that it’ll be the other way around and our kids will end up teaching the goody-goody Girl Scouts some of how the “bad girls” live. I really don’t want a goody-goody Girl Scout anyway, I’d rather have my daughters the way they are, with maybe a sprinkle more sugar – they have plenty of spice.
Only two more days, I can’t wait to go pick them up. Everyone seems to miss the kids, even the blonde minion who only fights with them. Yesterday she asked if it was "the number two day" and I figured that she meant it was Tuesday so I told her yes. Then she said "only three more days until we pick up my sisters!" and she seemed excited and happy. You would think that one kid would be easier to deal with than three, but its really the opposite. When their are more of them, they entertain each other more and aren't always in your face. Sure, they have their moments, but for the most part, they take care of each other. Its nice to have siblings.
I’m actually glad that she fell off the horse. We were concerned about both of the kids that are away and I know that I miss them – crazy as it sounds. After thinking about it, I realized that this is the longest that I’ve gone without talking to them, and I miss talking to them and hearing what crazy crap they have to say. Even when I deployed to Iraq, I was able to call home a couple times a day – your tax dollars at work!
But, if they’re having fun, playing with other kids, maybe some of the real Girl Scout kids will rub off on them. I have a suspicion that it’ll be the other way around and our kids will end up teaching the goody-goody Girl Scouts some of how the “bad girls” live. I really don’t want a goody-goody Girl Scout anyway, I’d rather have my daughters the way they are, with maybe a sprinkle more sugar – they have plenty of spice.
Only two more days, I can’t wait to go pick them up. Everyone seems to miss the kids, even the blonde minion who only fights with them. Yesterday she asked if it was "the number two day" and I figured that she meant it was Tuesday so I told her yes. Then she said "only three more days until we pick up my sisters!" and she seemed excited and happy. You would think that one kid would be easier to deal with than three, but its really the opposite. When their are more of them, they entertain each other more and aren't always in your face. Sure, they have their moments, but for the most part, they take care of each other. Its nice to have siblings.
Monday, June 11, 2007
Summer Camp
Two of my daughter’s left yesterday for Girl Scout Summer Camp. Its only 6 days long, but it’s the first time they’ve been away for longer than a night or two. Sure, I’ve been away for 6 months at a time, but its different when THEY leave YOU. I hate being away, but its no better when THEY are away.
I would like to enjoy the time they are away, but the third little minion is definitely trying to make up for her sisters being gone. She has gone into overtime on nerve ragging. I think maybe the other two do a lot to keep her out of trouble and on track when they are here.
I hope the girls are doing well at camp, and I hope they aren’t homesick. I hope they are having fun and I hope they are excited to be there. I know when we left them, they were ok, no tears or anything (except that the older one may have had a few leakers on the way up to the Girl Scout Camp). Its funny – when I told her that I’d miss her, she said, “I can’t say the same… well, I will miss you too, but I’ll miss the electronics more.” In some ways I know she was just trying to play down what she was feeling, and in another – she’s becoming a great little Geek Girl. Just like her Geek Dad. Maybe I’ll have to get her a binary shirt that says, “I hate boys.”
Her birthday is coming up soon – and she is spoiled as hell. I think she’s getting everything on her list – and its not cheap stuff. Most of it is justifiable (in my mind), but its still crazy. At least she makes good arguments for what she wants. And who am I to argue with reasoning like that – she uses the same arguments I use for myself when I get obsessed about something.
I can’t wait to pick them up on Friday.
I would like to enjoy the time they are away, but the third little minion is definitely trying to make up for her sisters being gone. She has gone into overtime on nerve ragging. I think maybe the other two do a lot to keep her out of trouble and on track when they are here.
I hope the girls are doing well at camp, and I hope they aren’t homesick. I hope they are having fun and I hope they are excited to be there. I know when we left them, they were ok, no tears or anything (except that the older one may have had a few leakers on the way up to the Girl Scout Camp). Its funny – when I told her that I’d miss her, she said, “I can’t say the same… well, I will miss you too, but I’ll miss the electronics more.” In some ways I know she was just trying to play down what she was feeling, and in another – she’s becoming a great little Geek Girl. Just like her Geek Dad. Maybe I’ll have to get her a binary shirt that says, “I hate boys.”
Her birthday is coming up soon – and she is spoiled as hell. I think she’s getting everything on her list – and its not cheap stuff. Most of it is justifiable (in my mind), but its still crazy. At least she makes good arguments for what she wants. And who am I to argue with reasoning like that – she uses the same arguments I use for myself when I get obsessed about something.
I can’t wait to pick them up on Friday.
Saturday, June 9, 2007
Obsession
In the past I haven’t thought of myself as an “obsessive” person. When I was a kid, my room was a mess – all the time. I rarely did homework and didn’t much care that my grades suffered for it. I HAVE always preferred to be with family than out with others. I didn’t even really like going to sleep-overs at my friends’ houses – I would rather be home. It appears that that was the first obsession I had – family. I don’t think its such a bad obsession – although sometimes I think my family might.
I think as I’ve gotten older, I’ve developed some obsessive tendencies. For example, if I want something, I go get it – whether it’s a game for the PS3 or a new Jeep. I do the research, figure out what – exactly – I want, then I find it and get it. Needless to say, this makes me difficult to shop for – if I know I want something, I probably already have it or am in the process of getting it. Luckily, my wife is one step ahead of me in knowing what I want and so she is the only one who manages to get me things for holidays that I didn’t know I wanted (yet), but did. This Christmas it was a mini-helicopter and I love it. For my birthday, it was a catapult – who doesn’t need a catapult on their desk now and then? I love them. The bad thing for everyone else is that I can’t tell them what I want because A) if I can afford it, I have it or B) if I can’t afford it, neither can they (for example, my current obsession is to get my Jeep lifted a couple inches and get bigger tires – rough estimate on cost is between $1000-$4000).
Now, it appears that keeping my daughter out of trouble has become another obsession. Its hard for me to let her out of my sight. This morning I took her to her friends house for a sleep-over. I gave her all the usual warning and talks (safety briefs?) like, “boys are bad” and “all little boys want to touch little girl parts,” and the rules “no being alone with any boy,” “always be with a girl friend,” “no kissing or touching boys,” and I had to emphasize today that she doesn’t look like she’s ten. She used to look like she was 13-14 before she got her hair cut and streaked, now she looks like she’s 15-16. That means she (and I) has to not only worry about boys her own age, but much older ones who are much more manipulative. I take comfort in the fact that she usually makes the right decisions, and knows that we’re looking out for her. Also, its nice that she’s on post and not out in the city – I feel I have a little bit for power here. I know where all the little boys’ fathers work.
On the internet front, she is doing good. There are still stupid people on Zwinky, but most are harmless. And most recognize that she’s ten and they need to steer clear. The ones that don’t are the ones that I watch that much more closely.
I think as I’ve gotten older, I’ve developed some obsessive tendencies. For example, if I want something, I go get it – whether it’s a game for the PS3 or a new Jeep. I do the research, figure out what – exactly – I want, then I find it and get it. Needless to say, this makes me difficult to shop for – if I know I want something, I probably already have it or am in the process of getting it. Luckily, my wife is one step ahead of me in knowing what I want and so she is the only one who manages to get me things for holidays that I didn’t know I wanted (yet), but did. This Christmas it was a mini-helicopter and I love it. For my birthday, it was a catapult – who doesn’t need a catapult on their desk now and then? I love them. The bad thing for everyone else is that I can’t tell them what I want because A) if I can afford it, I have it or B) if I can’t afford it, neither can they (for example, my current obsession is to get my Jeep lifted a couple inches and get bigger tires – rough estimate on cost is between $1000-$4000).
Now, it appears that keeping my daughter out of trouble has become another obsession. Its hard for me to let her out of my sight. This morning I took her to her friends house for a sleep-over. I gave her all the usual warning and talks (safety briefs?) like, “boys are bad” and “all little boys want to touch little girl parts,” and the rules “no being alone with any boy,” “always be with a girl friend,” “no kissing or touching boys,” and I had to emphasize today that she doesn’t look like she’s ten. She used to look like she was 13-14 before she got her hair cut and streaked, now she looks like she’s 15-16. That means she (and I) has to not only worry about boys her own age, but much older ones who are much more manipulative. I take comfort in the fact that she usually makes the right decisions, and knows that we’re looking out for her. Also, its nice that she’s on post and not out in the city – I feel I have a little bit for power here. I know where all the little boys’ fathers work.
On the internet front, she is doing good. There are still stupid people on Zwinky, but most are harmless. And most recognize that she’s ten and they need to steer clear. The ones that don’t are the ones that I watch that much more closely.
Friday, June 8, 2007
Child Tracking
I feel like I'm almost ahead of the game here. Recently, there have been at least two instances of children (well, teenagers really), who have been kidnapped from their local surroundings – one outside of Target of all places. These girls were not doing anything dangerous, or even borderline concerning. One was just getting stuff at Target in the middle of the day – there is really nothing safer than that – I would think. But, instead of going happily to her car, she is abducted and found dead 15 miles from the Target store. The police were able to use her cell phone signal to track her location – but obviously, it wasn't quick enough or precise enough. Cell phone signals are decent for getting a general vicinity kinda location – but not enough to pinpoint someone's precise whereabouts.
For a couple years now, my wife and I have been debating with what is the best way to track our kids – specifically the older one because she is away from the house the most without us. I looked into numerous methods and devices and most were pricey and had no benefit to the child – which means that she would conveniently "forget" it or lose it. If something has no practical purpose to a child or adolescent, the odds are they won't use it – and it has to go with whatever they are wearing. Finally, we found just the thing we needed, it was small, useful, and has a 99% chance of being taken with my daughter wherever she goes because its her cell phone! Now, I know I just said cell phones are great for tracking, but this one is different. It doesn't track the child using cell towers, it uses GPS signal and satellites to pin-point her location – and she doesn't even know it. Rather than buying a $500 pager-like device, I got a used LG Chocolate (Verizon network) on Ebay and will activate it with the Chaperone service for $10 a month. For the, I get the ability to see where my daughter is, in real-time from any computer with internet access, or my phone. That's the best deal in child tracking going. And, my daughter gets to be the envy of all her friends – which will only go to reinforce the probability that she takes the phone with her! As long as she lives with us, she will have some sort of tracking device on her. At first, I wanted to track her to make she she was being good. Now, I think that the sands have shifted and I'm actually more concerned with something happening to her that is out of her control than her being places she shouldn't be. Am I overprotective? Probably. But knowing that won't change it. As long as she is safe and I know it, we're good. It doesn't affect her at all because she doesn't even know she's being watched. If I could, I would change the position of the satellites in the sky to watch her.
I think that sometime in the near future, I'll get her signed up for some sort of self-defense / martial arts class. And then, later on, I'll get her some calf-high leather boots with a concealed dagger – just in case. Better safe than sorry, right?
For a couple years now, my wife and I have been debating with what is the best way to track our kids – specifically the older one because she is away from the house the most without us. I looked into numerous methods and devices and most were pricey and had no benefit to the child – which means that she would conveniently "forget" it or lose it. If something has no practical purpose to a child or adolescent, the odds are they won't use it – and it has to go with whatever they are wearing. Finally, we found just the thing we needed, it was small, useful, and has a 99% chance of being taken with my daughter wherever she goes because its her cell phone! Now, I know I just said cell phones are great for tracking, but this one is different. It doesn't track the child using cell towers, it uses GPS signal and satellites to pin-point her location – and she doesn't even know it. Rather than buying a $500 pager-like device, I got a used LG Chocolate (Verizon network) on Ebay and will activate it with the Chaperone service for $10 a month. For the, I get the ability to see where my daughter is, in real-time from any computer with internet access, or my phone. That's the best deal in child tracking going. And, my daughter gets to be the envy of all her friends – which will only go to reinforce the probability that she takes the phone with her! As long as she lives with us, she will have some sort of tracking device on her. At first, I wanted to track her to make she she was being good. Now, I think that the sands have shifted and I'm actually more concerned with something happening to her that is out of her control than her being places she shouldn't be. Am I overprotective? Probably. But knowing that won't change it. As long as she is safe and I know it, we're good. It doesn't affect her at all because she doesn't even know she's being watched. If I could, I would change the position of the satellites in the sky to watch her.
I think that sometime in the near future, I'll get her signed up for some sort of self-defense / martial arts class. And then, later on, I'll get her some calf-high leather boots with a concealed dagger – just in case. Better safe than sorry, right?
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
Privacy
How much actual privacy should a kid have? The real answer is NONE.
Ok, but that’s too simplistic and not realistic I suppose. I guess the privacy issue for me breaks down into two catagories – TRUE privacy and PERCEIVED privacy.
TRUE privacy is what things a kid does that the parents should not or would know about – ever. How much TRUE privacy is acceptable for kids under 18 living in my house? None. Ok, now that that’s cleared up…
PERCEIVED privacy is how much stuff a child does that they don’t think their parents know about. Things like all that silly stuff they do online, how long they stay up, whats written in the that secret diary locked away from prying eyes – that perceived privacy is what will keep kids from trying harder to achieve TRUE privacy – the more PERCEIVED privacy they have, the less they will go out of their way to hide things. After all, there is no sense in hiding things BETTER if they are already secured good enough – right?
My daughters have more than an ample supply of perceived privacy that they don’t feel the need to go out and get TRUE privacy. How do I know? Because I go through their rooms every once in a while looking for all those hidden things. And because I was a kid not so long ago, I know everywhere to look. Am I conceited enough to think that I know EVERYTHING? No. But I know about 99% of what is going on. The other 1% is probably not all that important anyway.
Bottom line is that kids don’t need ANY true privacy, but they do need perceived privacy so that they can learn what to share with others and what should be their own secrets. Before you let someone drive, they have fake cars, bicycles, etc to learn how to behave – its no different with privacy.
Ok, but that’s too simplistic and not realistic I suppose. I guess the privacy issue for me breaks down into two catagories – TRUE privacy and PERCEIVED privacy.
TRUE privacy is what things a kid does that the parents should not or would know about – ever. How much TRUE privacy is acceptable for kids under 18 living in my house? None. Ok, now that that’s cleared up…
PERCEIVED privacy is how much stuff a child does that they don’t think their parents know about. Things like all that silly stuff they do online, how long they stay up, whats written in the that secret diary locked away from prying eyes – that perceived privacy is what will keep kids from trying harder to achieve TRUE privacy – the more PERCEIVED privacy they have, the less they will go out of their way to hide things. After all, there is no sense in hiding things BETTER if they are already secured good enough – right?
My daughters have more than an ample supply of perceived privacy that they don’t feel the need to go out and get TRUE privacy. How do I know? Because I go through their rooms every once in a while looking for all those hidden things. And because I was a kid not so long ago, I know everywhere to look. Am I conceited enough to think that I know EVERYTHING? No. But I know about 99% of what is going on. The other 1% is probably not all that important anyway.
Bottom line is that kids don’t need ANY true privacy, but they do need perceived privacy so that they can learn what to share with others and what should be their own secrets. Before you let someone drive, they have fake cars, bicycles, etc to learn how to behave – its no different with privacy.
Tuesday, June 5, 2007
Blond Minion
Although this blog is primarily about dealing with my soon-to-be-eleventeen daughter, there are times when one of the other three does something worthy of inclusion. This weekend my youngest daughter (the four year old) had a couple near-misses with the grim-reaper (figuratively, not literally).
First, she had an incident last night that involved a whole tube of toothpaste – and then the subsequent clean up – the story goes something like this:
She was having a bad night, fighting with her sisters, being a nuisance to everyone, wouldn’t be good, wouldn’t be decent, wouldn’t be quiet – even for a few minutes. She got into trouble numerous times and eventually, she was on my last nerve. I took her upstairs in order to avoid further trouble – I put her to bed. Soon enough she came downstairs again, but she was ok for a few minutes. After that she started laying on, picking on her sister and generally being a brat. I saw it coming – she was going to push her sister too far and get whomped for it. She did and got smacked by her sister, and then proceeded to cry. I was done. I sent them both upstairs.
Not long after that, I hear the middle daughter saying something about “toothpaste,” and a mess. My lovely wife went upstairs to handle it because I was beyond my limit of crazy for the time being. Then she called me up. The bathroom had been decorated with nearly an entire tube (brand new) of green minty toothpaste. It was on the doorknob, the sink, the handles, the plunger, the toilet seat, the floor, the wall, and some had even been specially applied to the toilet paper – the rest of the tube had been used to freshen up the bedroom – especially the ladder that goes up to the top bunk.
Needless to say, the blond minion was in hiding. A quick search of the upper rooms was unsuccessful – only after a more thorough search did we find the toothpaste artist hiding in her sisters closet underneath some clothes.
Long story short – she was made to clean up her messes and then some. She finished sometime around 2 am. The other two daughters received splash effect from the bomb dropped on the blond minion and had to clean their rooms. This started at about 11 pm.
Then today, the blond minion went into hiding again. We didn’t know why until we searched through the upstairs – again – looking for her. She has some smarts and didn’t hide in the same place as before. Instead, she hid underneath her sister’s bed. One look at her told the story of why she was in hiding. In one hand she held her pre-school safety scissors, on her head – hair was missing. Mostly just a chunk or two from the bangs and sides, but enough to make her look silly. Well, we can’t very well make her put it back on, so she’ll just look silly for awhile.
Hopefully, this craziness is done with for now and we can go back to not playing hide-and-seek with her everyday.
First, she had an incident last night that involved a whole tube of toothpaste – and then the subsequent clean up – the story goes something like this:
She was having a bad night, fighting with her sisters, being a nuisance to everyone, wouldn’t be good, wouldn’t be decent, wouldn’t be quiet – even for a few minutes. She got into trouble numerous times and eventually, she was on my last nerve. I took her upstairs in order to avoid further trouble – I put her to bed. Soon enough she came downstairs again, but she was ok for a few minutes. After that she started laying on, picking on her sister and generally being a brat. I saw it coming – she was going to push her sister too far and get whomped for it. She did and got smacked by her sister, and then proceeded to cry. I was done. I sent them both upstairs.
Not long after that, I hear the middle daughter saying something about “toothpaste,” and a mess. My lovely wife went upstairs to handle it because I was beyond my limit of crazy for the time being. Then she called me up. The bathroom had been decorated with nearly an entire tube (brand new) of green minty toothpaste. It was on the doorknob, the sink, the handles, the plunger, the toilet seat, the floor, the wall, and some had even been specially applied to the toilet paper – the rest of the tube had been used to freshen up the bedroom – especially the ladder that goes up to the top bunk.
Needless to say, the blond minion was in hiding. A quick search of the upper rooms was unsuccessful – only after a more thorough search did we find the toothpaste artist hiding in her sisters closet underneath some clothes.
Long story short – she was made to clean up her messes and then some. She finished sometime around 2 am. The other two daughters received splash effect from the bomb dropped on the blond minion and had to clean their rooms. This started at about 11 pm.
Then today, the blond minion went into hiding again. We didn’t know why until we searched through the upstairs – again – looking for her. She has some smarts and didn’t hide in the same place as before. Instead, she hid underneath her sister’s bed. One look at her told the story of why she was in hiding. In one hand she held her pre-school safety scissors, on her head – hair was missing. Mostly just a chunk or two from the bangs and sides, but enough to make her look silly. Well, we can’t very well make her put it back on, so she’ll just look silly for awhile.
Hopefully, this craziness is done with for now and we can go back to not playing hide-and-seek with her everyday.
Daddys Girl
Back when I got back from Iraq, Ember was more than a handful – she was very defiant, mouthy and unruly – which I completely attribute to hormonal changes she was and still is going through. At first I tried to take a hard line with her, setting very strict standards and rules, bedtimes, chores, etc. It didn’t work, she was defiant as ever and just had more to be defiant against. She, of course, hated me, blah blah blah.
Then I decided to take a different approach – I was going to turn her into a Daddy’s Girl. I started treating her more like an adult, with more freedom and less restriction. Actually, she just thinks she has more freedom and less restriction – none of the rules really changed – and in fact, she has MORE chores to do. It’s the illusion of freedom that she has. What she does get is more respect and she gets treated like a child less. We let her babysit when we are gone, we sometimes let her eat in the living room with us (we do it to get away from the relentless nagging of the children – I know, bad parents). She now has her own cell phone, a laptop she can use whenever she wants, an MP3 player, a TV, PS2, a bank account, and an allowance. Her chores are to take out the kitchen garbage every day, keep her room clean, and whatever random things I ask her to do - like empty the dishwasher, vacuum wherever and whatever we need done.
I have also given her more attention – hugs and kisses and stuff like that. Adolescents don’t usually like affection from their parents, especially in public, but she deals with in tolerably well and even voluntarily cuddles on the couch sometimes.
My goal of making her a “Daddy’s Girl” is progressing nicely.
Now, why would I want to make her a Daddy’s Girl? Because in order to help mold her into a young lady and strong woman, she first needs to become moldable. And then, I’ve always liked the notion that people will rise to the level that you treat them as. If I treat her like a lady, she will become a lady. If I treat her like a child, she will act like a child. I figure I have less than 8 years to make her into a strong young lady, and I can’t waste a moment of time.
Then I decided to take a different approach – I was going to turn her into a Daddy’s Girl. I started treating her more like an adult, with more freedom and less restriction. Actually, she just thinks she has more freedom and less restriction – none of the rules really changed – and in fact, she has MORE chores to do. It’s the illusion of freedom that she has. What she does get is more respect and she gets treated like a child less. We let her babysit when we are gone, we sometimes let her eat in the living room with us (we do it to get away from the relentless nagging of the children – I know, bad parents). She now has her own cell phone, a laptop she can use whenever she wants, an MP3 player, a TV, PS2, a bank account, and an allowance. Her chores are to take out the kitchen garbage every day, keep her room clean, and whatever random things I ask her to do - like empty the dishwasher, vacuum wherever and whatever we need done.
I have also given her more attention – hugs and kisses and stuff like that. Adolescents don’t usually like affection from their parents, especially in public, but she deals with in tolerably well and even voluntarily cuddles on the couch sometimes.
My goal of making her a “Daddy’s Girl” is progressing nicely.
Now, why would I want to make her a Daddy’s Girl? Because in order to help mold her into a young lady and strong woman, she first needs to become moldable. And then, I’ve always liked the notion that people will rise to the level that you treat them as. If I treat her like a lady, she will become a lady. If I treat her like a child, she will act like a child. I figure I have less than 8 years to make her into a strong young lady, and I can’t waste a moment of time.
School's Out
Now that school is out, my daughter has a lot more time on her hands. Thankfully, she is still sort of into Girl Scouts (now that she has moved up from a Junior to a Cadette). I am trying to get her to do something related to Girl Scouts every day, just to keep her in the groove and so she doesn’t turn into a internet veggie.
Zwinky
Zwinky is a chat site that uses stupid ass looking cartoon characters to interact with other kids / adults from around the world / country. Ember uses Zwinky as her primary chat source and cyber “hookup” site. Because she is only 10, her “hookups” only consist of being someone’s cyber bf or gf. And that personal typically changes on a daily or weekly basis – last week it was some guy with the screen name of Kraven (who she actually took a step further with and got his email address and was MSN Messenger chatting as well – more on that in a bit), this week its someone with the name hilc3. Keeping up with her cyber bfs is sometimes a challenge.
Back to the Kraven character. As soon as she added his email address to her messenger list I went and checked up on him online – MySpace, Facebook and all the rest – in addition to a detailed Google search. As it turns out he is 18, lives in Puerto Rico and really is no threat to come looking for my daughter. Their conversations were completely platonic. But, I’m always leery of anyone who talks to my daughters.
This new guy is a little different. He’s still playing the bf/gf game but he’s a lot more possessive of my daughters character than the other guy. She hasn’t given him her email address, so that’s good. He’s also more physical with his chats – more kisses, hugs, etc. I don’t like it and so I’ve created my own Zwinky character to monitor what shes up to in real-time. I am, however, very proud of my daughter’s reaction to Hilcs advances – she pushes him away and says she’s 10 and doesn’t do adult things. She knows the limits we’ve set and sticks to them even when she thinks no one is watching. That is conforting. Of course, if she didn’t I’d block her MAC address until I had time to “retrain” her.
Zwinky is not as kid friendly as VMK (Disneys Kid Chat area), and allows more of the “bad” words – in fact VMK doesn’t even let you say “hot” – so the kids have worked around it and now they ask each other if they are “hat.” Since when do 10 and 11 year old kids care if they are “hot” or not?
Zwinky still doesn’t allow outright profane language – it automatically “(bleeps)” obviously bad words. But if they put a space somewhere in the word, it allows it. The funny thing I’ve done with Zwinky and my daughter is to tell Ember that Zwinky emails me when she does something that is not right. It works great because it gives me an outlet to let her think that someone is watching what is going on and if things get out of hand, we WILL know about it.
It gives her freedom with a safety net.
Back to the Kraven character. As soon as she added his email address to her messenger list I went and checked up on him online – MySpace, Facebook and all the rest – in addition to a detailed Google search. As it turns out he is 18, lives in Puerto Rico and really is no threat to come looking for my daughter. Their conversations were completely platonic. But, I’m always leery of anyone who talks to my daughters.
This new guy is a little different. He’s still playing the bf/gf game but he’s a lot more possessive of my daughters character than the other guy. She hasn’t given him her email address, so that’s good. He’s also more physical with his chats – more kisses, hugs, etc. I don’t like it and so I’ve created my own Zwinky character to monitor what shes up to in real-time. I am, however, very proud of my daughter’s reaction to Hilcs advances – she pushes him away and says she’s 10 and doesn’t do adult things. She knows the limits we’ve set and sticks to them even when she thinks no one is watching. That is conforting. Of course, if she didn’t I’d block her MAC address until I had time to “retrain” her.
Zwinky is not as kid friendly as VMK (Disneys Kid Chat area), and allows more of the “bad” words – in fact VMK doesn’t even let you say “hot” – so the kids have worked around it and now they ask each other if they are “hat.” Since when do 10 and 11 year old kids care if they are “hot” or not?
Zwinky still doesn’t allow outright profane language – it automatically “(bleeps)” obviously bad words. But if they put a space somewhere in the word, it allows it. The funny thing I’ve done with Zwinky and my daughter is to tell Ember that Zwinky emails me when she does something that is not right. It works great because it gives me an outlet to let her think that someone is watching what is going on and if things get out of hand, we WILL know about it.
It gives her freedom with a safety net.
Perfect Keylogger
I originally got PK back in the day when I may or may not have been spying (with permission) on a brother-in-law. It was my first time spying, but it was productive and definitely a learning experience. I learned specifically NOT to use an email address with your name in it when you are having someone else’s computer send you stuff (a big time n00b mistake). Since it was discovered, I stopped using it – until now.
Perfect Keylogger, by www dot blazingtools dot com, is the best spying program I’ve used. Initially, I installed it on my daughter’s computer and had it set to send logs every 5 hours. Since then, I’ve cut the time back to every hour and then every half-hour. I also have it take screenshots every 3 minutes. Its fantastic.
The only problem I’ve had with the keylogger is antispyware and antivirus programs. I like to keep my network safe, but everything I’ve installed always wants to uninstall Perfect Keylogger (go figure). I have since removed the spyware checkers and AV software. I now manually check her computer for other bad software when she sleeps.
PK gives me the ability to check on my daughter at any interval I want without her knowing about it. And I can check on her from anywhere. I love it.
So, not to cut this short, but I have some logs to go read.
Perfect Keylogger, by www dot blazingtools dot com, is the best spying program I’ve used. Initially, I installed it on my daughter’s computer and had it set to send logs every 5 hours. Since then, I’ve cut the time back to every hour and then every half-hour. I also have it take screenshots every 3 minutes. Its fantastic.
The only problem I’ve had with the keylogger is antispyware and antivirus programs. I like to keep my network safe, but everything I’ve installed always wants to uninstall Perfect Keylogger (go figure). I have since removed the spyware checkers and AV software. I now manually check her computer for other bad software when she sleeps.
PK gives me the ability to check on my daughter at any interval I want without her knowing about it. And I can check on her from anywhere. I love it.
So, not to cut this short, but I have some logs to go read.
Daughters' Father
I’m starting this blog just to keep myself up to date on what its like to raise MY daughters (specifically my 10, almost 11, year old who thinks and feels that she is 22 or so). I have a total of four daughters ranging in age from nearly 11 to 4. However, at the present time, only one is advanced enough to make keeping up with her a challenge. Once the others grow up, I’m sure they’ll get their share of the spotlight as well.
I’d have to say this all really started while I was away in Iraq. During that time, she grew up way too fast. She developed hormonally and physically and changed from my cute little girl who played soccer and t-ball and loved school into an adolescent girl who chases boys, surfs the internet from dawn to dusk (and beyond), and loves chat rooms – the mostly kiddie oriented ones like Disney VMK and Zwinky (which isn’t all that kid oriented, but does have stupid little characters that you dress up).
I’ve read all the stuff about watching your kids online and all that and I do. But, I also know from personal experience that kids always have ways of doing stuff when the adults aren’t watching. My 10 year old (lets call her… Ember) is no different. I intentionally give her some freedom online to do what she wants and go where she wants. However, I also have ways of keeping very good tabs on everything she does and what she is exposed to. I know that there are things she is seeing that are what I would consider well beyond what she should be seeing, but I am also seeing how she reacts to it and how she does or does not participate in it. The world is not a sheltered place where kids only see the good and fluffy side of the world. At schools, even the best schools, there are kids who are past their age in experience.
This blog is about how my I am monitoring my daughter and her activities in the internet world and real life. I would put this up on my MySpace, but I have no doubt that Ember will have her own MySpace soon enough and I don’t want her knowing how well I’m watching. She’s a smart girl and I have no doubt she could find ways around what I have watching her.
So, if you found your way here you are either someone related to the issue at hand, have been invited to view this window into my parenting skills (or lack thereof), or have stumbled randomly upon this for some unknown reason and have read through all the stuff above without getting bored and going away. Regardless of who you are – welcome. And if you know who the daughter in question is – DON’T TELL HER ANYTHING!
Thanks.
I’d have to say this all really started while I was away in Iraq. During that time, she grew up way too fast. She developed hormonally and physically and changed from my cute little girl who played soccer and t-ball and loved school into an adolescent girl who chases boys, surfs the internet from dawn to dusk (and beyond), and loves chat rooms – the mostly kiddie oriented ones like Disney VMK and Zwinky (which isn’t all that kid oriented, but does have stupid little characters that you dress up).
I’ve read all the stuff about watching your kids online and all that and I do. But, I also know from personal experience that kids always have ways of doing stuff when the adults aren’t watching. My 10 year old (lets call her… Ember) is no different. I intentionally give her some freedom online to do what she wants and go where she wants. However, I also have ways of keeping very good tabs on everything she does and what she is exposed to. I know that there are things she is seeing that are what I would consider well beyond what she should be seeing, but I am also seeing how she reacts to it and how she does or does not participate in it. The world is not a sheltered place where kids only see the good and fluffy side of the world. At schools, even the best schools, there are kids who are past their age in experience.
This blog is about how my I am monitoring my daughter and her activities in the internet world and real life. I would put this up on my MySpace, but I have no doubt that Ember will have her own MySpace soon enough and I don’t want her knowing how well I’m watching. She’s a smart girl and I have no doubt she could find ways around what I have watching her.
So, if you found your way here you are either someone related to the issue at hand, have been invited to view this window into my parenting skills (or lack thereof), or have stumbled randomly upon this for some unknown reason and have read through all the stuff above without getting bored and going away. Regardless of who you are – welcome. And if you know who the daughter in question is – DON’T TELL HER ANYTHING!
Thanks.
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